Shining My Light on Bilingualism and Fulbright

There are different ways to analyze interviews that are commonly used by linguists (e.g., content analysis (Gheyle & Jacobs, 2017)). In the section following the interviews I will be classifying those issues into groups (i.e., language learning and teaching, identity, culture, politics). I am aware of «the temptation to carve out those more quotable parts that serve our purposes» (Pavlenko, 2007). However, as much as I will be trying to stay objective, I agree that as a writer at this stage I am bringing some of my own biases into the project.

I am perfectly aware of the possible limitations of such studies and possible criticisms of some methods of collecting qualitative interview data and analyzing it addressed in scientific literature. For example, as part of this project I have been focusing only on the oral narrative data obtained from the participants. Besides, as my stay in the U.S. was limited, I had no opportunity to conduct longitudinal studies. Another crucial factor is the language of the interviews. All of them were conducted in English. Even though all of the participants are confident English users, it is obvious that they might have faced some difficulties getting their message across and making it more nuanced, which native speakers did not. Finally, as I previously said, I did not attempt to target any specific groups of bilinguals and included individuals with various levels of language competence into the project. I hope that despite all of these obvious limitations, my readers will be able to benefit from the following 51 interviews that are to be read either individually or in the same order they are presented in the book.

Part 1.3. MEET MY BILINGUALS!

First, before you get to know my bilinguals and find out about their linguistic adventures, let’s imagine I asked myself these same questions on my long flight from Paris to Miami on August 21, 2017. This will also be a way for me to introduce myself to those who might not know me while talking about my own language journey that got underway way before I found myself on this plane crossing the Atlantic for the first time in my life.

Me and my life-long commitment to English (Olga, Russia)

Languages spoken: Russian, English, German, some Italian, French, Spanish.

Field of study/career: English teacher, translator, researcher (Linguistics).

I had my first English class at Grade 2 at the age of 8. For months before that «big day», I had been growing more and more excited. As I had learned some of the English alphabet, I thought I would master English when I had learned all the letters and would simply use them instead of the corresponding Russian ones. For example, I remember writing the Russian word for «granddad» (дед in Russian) as «ded» naively thinking that was a proper English word! I had no idea what kind of disappointment I would be in for when my real English classes started!

Back in the 1990s English wasn’t a compulsory foreign language to learn in Russia until Grade 5. At my school in a small town in the country’s southwest, it was possible to start taking it earlier as an optional free class. Even though in the post-Soviet Russia English didn’t enjoy the same level of prestige as it would around a decade or so later, it still seemed a good idea to start at an earlier age.

It didn’t take me too long to start getting disappointed – it wasn’t about specific difficulties I had, but that was because of the teacher who would spend almost the entire class yelling and screaming at us. She loved to write in huge handwriting and once in Grade 3 she gave me a huge «3-” (or a «C-») for a test. I was called «the family’s disgrace» by Mum when she found that notebook that I had been trying so hard to hide somewhere in the apartment. I think this phrase stuck with me for years and was part of my motivation to persevere with English. My sister, who was in Grade 8 back then, was doing exceptionally and unbelievably well academically, particularly in the Russian language. She had been winning all sorts of school competitions and was featured in a local newspaper a few times.

Deep down inside, I wanted to be at least a tiny bit as smart as my sister I saw working with huge dictionaries of Russian. Not wanting to be a complete «copycat», I picked up a visual dictionary of English. Somehow I had a gut feeling it was going to be a truly «big» moment in my life. It wasn’t large so by the end of the summer, I had studied it from cover to cover. I picked up a few more English books – including the legendary (in the former USSR, anyway) English course by Наталья Бонк (Natalia Bonk) and noticed I was getting more and more interested…

In the early 2000s music was the only window into a «foreign» (Western) world. Once I heard some songs by a British pop band on a radio show hosted by a Russian journalist living in London (which seemed to be somewhere on the Moon!). They somehow stroke a chord with me and sparked my interest in English even more. What I really loved was reading and translating their song lyrics my sister’s friend downloaded from the Internet for me (I didn’t even get my first computer till Grade 10). I would keep notes of any new vocabulary I came across.

School classes of English where we did nothing but do boring grammar exercises and translate texts from English into Russian had become nothing but an obligation. I realized that early on I would have to take responsibility for my own learning. So, I ended up with an inconsistent «diet» of whatever textbooks I could get my hands on. I did all the tasks in writing in a thick notebook and used the answer key to check my answers.

Eventually my teacher (the same that would still scream and yell at us) noticed my interest in her subject and I became her favorite. It seemed as if she was occasionally even relying on me for translations! I was hoping I had started to prove I wasn’t «the family’s disgrace». I can’t think of any difficulties I had at that point at all. I loved every minute of my independent learning, which seemed to be the most enjoyable thing unlike all those boring school classes (probably apart from Russian and Literature). Or I might have loved English too much by that point to even start noticing any difficulties.

It wasn’t until I participated in regional school competitions in English that I realized I couldn’t speak like those kids from the region’s capital! I had trained myself quite well in grammar and vocabulary, but it hadn’t ever occurred to me what I had been doing all of that for. I had treated English more as a funny game without thinking it was an actual language you had to speak!

As there were still no opportunities to practise speaking, I continued working with the other aspects. For reading I had some classics and a few Oxford readers. Apart from listening to a few audiobooks on my tape recorder and later a CD-player, I studied a video course on CD-ROM after we had finally got a computer. I didn’t pay much attention to writing. I only wish I had attempted to write in English creatively while still at high school.

Anyway, I knew well before I had finished school that English would be my future career. I was obsessed with it while my classmates were going on first dates and having fun. «English is your boyfriend», I remember one of them saying trying to make fun of that boring «nerd» I was considered to be. «Probably that was true», I thought to myself and stayed focused on my goals. One of the crucial ones was to pass my university exams to be able to study for free. In the early 2000s English was considered a prestigious foreign language as probably everything which had a word «foreign» in it. So, getting into Foreign Language Departments were very challenging. I chose the teaching path over the translating one, because it was more accessible for kids from small towns like myself who could only afford to study for free.

As hiring a private tutor wasn’t an option at all, I prepared for my entrance exams all on my own. I attended a preparatory course at my university of choice, which involved waking up at 3am every Saturday to take an early morning train to get to Voronezh which was 250 km away. However, I wouldn’t say I had learned much, but at least I had a chance to start speaking English while talking on some philosophic issues – I would be doing a lot of that at university!

When I became a student at Foreign Languages Department of Voronezh State Pedagogical University, learning got insanely intense from the very get-go. «English is going to continue to be my boyfriend», I laughed to myself. Honestly, I didn’t mind that as at that point I was deeply in love and was ready to commit. My love grew more intense as at university classes we dived into advanced grammar and had extensive speaking practice. We would joke how after five years at Foreign Languages Department we would be ready to have extended conversations about anything under the sun. The only thing that made me suffer was Phonetics during the freshman year. Somehow I never truly attached much importance to how I sounded in English, because I had zero ear for music…

Halfway through my studies we had a course on Writing and that was got me falling for English even more. It was my first proper experience of writing creatively in it and I was feeling all the efforts I had put into writing down and memorizing that «fancy» vocabulary from all possible sources while my university classmates were out dating were paying off! Getting access to the high-speed Internet in my final year was a big milestone. I would stay up listening to a random selection of BBC podcasts or watching some TV shows. I started realizing how «real» this language was. It was then I got to have a Skype chat with a real native speaker I met on a pen pal website. Yes, back then I thought native speakers were walking gods or something!

The first teaching practice that we had in the fourth year of university was disappointing, but honestly, I didn’t quite expect I would love it at all. Working with kids had never been my thing and would never be. After that experience, I felt that my English that I had been working so insanely hard to study had been touched with some dirty hands. Of course, I would never stop working on improving my English and eventually had to let go of those feelings, because otherwise I would have gone mad – even teaching at my own university where to my astonishment, a lot of students training to become English teachers didn’t make any effort to learn at all. Or was I thinking like that just because I had been making too much of it..?

A few months before graduation I got my first job as a translator for a scientific journal in Architecture and I became a teacher at my own department a year after graduation. That was when I first traveled abroad and got a chance to practise English not only on Skype with a few more native speakers I had met. I did German as a secondary foreign language at university. I wasn’t enthusiastic about it as I wish I had studied French instead. Inspired by my trip to Italy, I started learning Italian. A bit later I got to see a bit of France, my dream country since childhood. So, I added French to my self-study plan. As a language teacher, I knew I wouldn’t be able to master either of these languages reasonably well, but I felt that unlike German that had been forced on me, those two languages were my foreign language «affairs» I would escape to whenever the teaching routine got a bit too exhausting. I also had a quick try at Spanish before a brief conference trip to Spain, but this language didn’t get me too interested for some reason. Traveling also inspired me to start a travel blog in English and to let out all the creative impulses I had been suppressing.

Conference trips to Europe really allowed me to feel the power of English as a lingua franca. Even though doing research felt intimidating, I was happy to present as long as I could do it in English. Listening to other presentations, I got exposed to a great variety of accents. Exciting networking events during the conferences gave me the opportunity to use English in more casual environments. What I realized was that real-world communication in English is a lot «messier» than we try to make it seem in the language classroom. Pronunciation or grammar mistakes, which it is part of our job to correct, do not matter that much as long as one is able to get their message across. Most teachers should be aware of that, but unless you travel internationally, it is hard to feel what you teach is completely real and is actually a communication tool.

That kid who started learning English back in the 90s had absolutely no idea she would get to travel outside her country at all. English has definitely been an extremely powerful tool in making something I wouldn’t even dare dream of a reality. So, having this power available to me makes me feel different while speaking English. I am naturally introverted and don’t feel too comfortable in big groups. But when I speak English, I generally feel more cheerful, friendly and confident as if I were exploring this new side of me I had no idea existed. I am still an introverted me in English as well, but by speaking this language I feel I am embracing internationalism and cosmopolitanism as well as celebrating all the work I have done in order to master English. I also feel my voice sounds different in English, which I had others point out as well. In Russian I feel more vulnerable and even less interesting to myself feeling the exciting new life English has offered me has been snatched away from me. It is easy to take our first languages for granted – probably that is the price we pay for the commitment we make to another language, which has been more than just a communicative tool, more than just a job which pays my bills, but a real passion. I am still confused as to how incorporate my «Russianness» into my English (i.e., international) identity. I don’t think I have developed any sort of other personality for the other languages I only know some basics of.

As the U.S. is a linguistic and cultural melting pot, I might even get to practise these extra languages (German, Italian, French, Spanish) while I’m there. Honestly, I had never expected I would get to go to this country – especially for such an extended amount of time. I can’t believe I have won a Fulbright scholarship, which my English has certainly played a part in. Actually, as an English teacher, I was expected to go to the UK first, because in Russia we were taught and some say they teach (I’m not one of them) the British variety of English. Now I see this language as truly international and not belonging to any specific country. That is how I like to feel when I speak and particularly write in it. Yes, I feel a lot of us (i.e., non-natives) have to claim the ownership of this language.

I know I am going to be in a country where English (there is no official language in the U.S., by the way) is predominantly spoken. However, I am more excited not about linguistic adventures (which I am sure I am in for), but cultural experiences with people all over the world – fellow Fulbrighters as well as other internationals living in the U.S. As Fulbrighters we are also supposed to be «cultural ambassadors» of our respective countries, which is a daunting role knowing that you might be the first person from Russia someone is going to meet. Also, given the never-ending political tensions between Russia and the U.S., I realize when I return home, fellow Russians would expect me to be their guide into what life in the U.S. is like. Some might even think I have somehow betrayed my home country by going to America, which some Russians think is our number-one enemy… There will be definitely be others wondering why someone would even come back from what might be paradise on Earth… All I know is that it is going to be complicated, but exciting as well!

Even though the Russian society is still divided over how the West (how it is collectively imagined) is to be treated, a lot of Russians – at least those living in bigger cities – have a more nuanced understanding of life abroad due to having been able to travel internationally, which has certainly become more accessible for some. So, the «iron curtain» mindset cultivated in the USSR when overseas traveling was restricted is no longer ever-present. Going abroad is no longer universally seen almost as flying to the Moon. English is no longer seen as something abstract and simply prestigious either. Even though it is not widely spoken in Russia, more active and ambitious Russians treat as a tool that would fast-track their international careers. It is not a secret there are some compatriots who would love to move to other countries either temporarily or permanently, for which English is mostly likely essential.

Finally, to everyone looking to succeed in language learning, I would recommend simply falling in love – with the language itself, its culture, people (or a particular person for that matter). Each aspect (listening, reading, writing, speaking) would involve certain difficulties and practice, but you will be able to deal with any problems and find the time you need to build your skills if you are genuinely into this.

∞ Now that I have caught a glimpse of Miami through a plane window, I know my U.S. adventure has finally started! I can’t wait to ask my participants these same questions I have just answered and find out their perspective.

A charming and super educated bilingual (Apoorva, India)

Languages spoken: Hindi, English, Urdu.

Field of study/career: Literature, Higher Education and Administration Policy (Teacher’s College, University of Columbia).

I met Apoorva, an epitomy of the Bollywood beauty, during the Fulbright orientation event in Miami and was really amazed by how charming she was from outside and inside. She comes from India where English is quite widely spoken.

During my first days in New Jersey where my host university was located as well as during my first (quite humble and intimidating) commutes to NYC, even being a university English teacher, I had to admit to have been struggling with English a bit. For example, while ordering my coffee at the university diner I would sometimes have difficulties interacting with waiters as they spoke super fast and there were too many options to choose from, which I wasn’t used to at all. That certainly reinforced that stereotype of the culture of consumerism so prevalent in the U.S.

NYC can be too much – visually, sensually and linguistically as well. When a fellow Russian Fulbrighter, Apoorva and I met in Central Park in New York City, we all probably needed a break from the city’s linguistic hustle and bustle.

The choice of the first interviewee wasn’t intentional or scientifically justified. Back in Miami I had mentioned my project to Apoorva and she volunteered to participate. Probably I felt she had just the right energy as I knew from the get-go, it wasn’t going to be a purely rational and rigorously scientific endeavor…

Being in Central Park and picking a random bench to get comfortable for the interview had a certain cinematographic feel to it. As I was filming it (as well as most of the interviews that followed), for some reason I had a random thought of Woody Allen. So many iconic Hollywood films have been made (and I guess some by many other companies in many other languages as well) right in this spot. I knew I would be writing about this moment so here I am…

Apoorva started learning English as part of a basic curriculum at school at the age of 3. In India it is common to go to an English-medium school as this country used to be a British colony. So, as a result, Apoorva thinks that «50 to 60% of Indians speak English very well».

At her English classes back there was a lot of focus on grammar and eventually the emphasis on writing well increased. Then in what could be an equivalent of an American «high-school» spoken English skills got «polished». Apoorva attended a convent and in these institutions students actually got penalized if they were found speaking any other language rather than English and their mother tongue were only allowed during recess. As for mistake correction, there was also an «over-emphasis» on pronunciation and the teacher had a rather strong authority.

According to Apoorva, in her home country speaking English is looked upon as something «very respectable». Initially she didn’t feel confident enough as she hadn’t grown up in an English-speaking environment even though her parents are «fairly fluent» in English. There are actually households in India where different generations of a family would speak English with each other in private settings. It wasn’t till middle school that she finally gained enough confidence to speak English.

As being able to speak this language well is «imbued with a certain sense of superiority» even in India, some younger people might start ignoring their own mother tongues. Of course, with India being so big, English eventually acquired its own varieties inside the country and «grammar may differ from state to state». Apoorva emphasizes the role of the native culture which finds its way into the way people use the language.

She said she had been contemplating issues surrounding language acquisition and use more after completing her undergrad in Literature which gave her «a renewed passion for languages» and «a newfound respect for my own language». Reflecting more on her adolescence, she recollects how even for formal requests back at school students still had to use English. Also, in formal gatherings rarely would you find someone asking you questions in Hindi or any other language spoken in India. So, Apoorva often heard fellow Indians approaching her with the questions such as «What’s your name?», «How are you doing at school?». Then the conversation might «transgress» into another language.

Apoorva admits that she is still struggling with syntax which is so different from her mother tongue – Hindi. For example, she is annoyed by how every once in a while she still uses wrong articles. Another thing she can’t get her head around is how some grammar rules might vary from country to country. After studying in institutions around the world where English «has been a medium of instruction for centuries», Apoorva concludes that sometimes it was «just the matter of taste».

There were instances when she felt somehow upset by her interactions with native speakers of English. She remembers how after arriving in London for her Masters she had to struggle trying to understand what the receptionist at her bed-and-breakfast was saying. Back home it was not a problem to approach people and ask them as many questions as you needed, but that man seemed to have gotten annoyed as it might not be so common in the UK. So, he turned to his friend and said, «She will not be able to survive in England. She can’t speak English!». Apoorva’s friend in her turn replied, «But she has a degree in English so she probably knows more than you!».

Ironically, Apoorva notes, the first department of English Literature was actually founded in India (Bombay) in the 19^th century. In the UK English wasn’t considered to be important for studying, so they were focusing on Greek and Latin. From the scientific perspective, Indians are «supposed to have the most perfect pronunciation of English». So this case «was a pinch of salt» as Apoorva was proud to have maintained her «Indian/Hindi accent».

At this point, Apoorva describes herself as «well-versed» in English. She feels so natural using a combination of languages that it is actually difficult to express herself «in one language entirely». Speech that «flows from Hindi to English and Urdu and back to English» is «an expression of who I am», says Apoorva. This is so much «part of my identity and I’m not trying to fit in either mode». This, as she calls it, «mélange» of languages is an essential part of her linguistic personality.

Reflecting on the image she projects onto others based on her language choices, Apoorva says that outside India people might have a different impression of her when she’s not speaking English. But once she starts doing that, they might change their impression of her. As it is a «superior» language, suddenly others «take notice of you».

Here in the US from the moment she landed, people have been saying «You speak English so well». But that might come «from the ignorance that Indians don’t speak English very well». Apoorva is adamant that there are a lot of people she knows who speak much better, their grammar is «fantabulous», so she takes these comments «with a pinch of salt». She feels lucky that unlike some people who have to make an effort to acquire this language, she learned it as part of her school curriculum back in India.

Her linguistic journey continues as after 4.5 years of working in the field of Higher Education Administration Policy, she got a Fulbright scholarship to study at Teacher’s College (Columbia University).

Finally, when it comes to some tips as to how to master a language well, Apoorva believes the key is to find a way to feel comfortable in it. Speaking in any language «involves your own style». So you don’t have to imitate your teacher’s language. Once you achieve that level of comfort and whatever you are saying is perfectly right in your own head, you will be very confident. «Don’t think of it as a language outside yourself», but rather «make it your own».

∞ It was enlightening to hear about a linguistic adventure of someone living in a country where English has a different status than in mine. It is obvious that the way any language is used and treated in any given state can be subject to change, but what cannot be denied is that in general English learning and teaching experiences would be different in India and Russia.

Delving into Apoorva’s internal and external beauty as well as her beautiful English was an absolute pleasure. That was how I knew I was going to continue working on this interview project – even just for meeting such smart and truly articulate individuals as Apoorva. I couldn’t help but notice how eloquent she was and how her own individual style of putting her thoughts into words shone through during our talk. It is true indeed that a radiant personality cannot possibly be hidden – no matter what language one chooses or has to speak.

Whenever I got to meet Apoorva throughout my year in the U.S., I felt that special bond we had, which shows how coming from different countries might not matter as long as you have one language you share – even if the way you both speak it might differ in terms of pronunciation, syntax, vocabulary choices, etc.

As I felt I had gotten off to a good start with my project, I was more than ready to dive deeper into an intrinsic linguistic fabric of the Big Apple as well as my home state of New Jersey…

A humble and hard-working bilingual

(Masumi, Japan)

Languages spoken: Japanese, English, Chinese.

Field of study/career: Linguistics, Business (Baruch College, CUNY).

I met Masumi from Japan on a sunny Saturday afternoon in Coney Island, Brooklyn, around an hour’s subway ride from Downtown Manhattan. For the International Coastal Cleanup Day, One To World, an organization whose mission is to promote intercultural understanding, organized an event bringing together international students and scholars. It was a really interesting way of meeting new like-minded people, which is particularly essential during the first days of an extended stay abroad.

Getting together with a multilingual team for an environmental cause to pick up some trash along the coastline was a nice experience. At this point being in the US felt more like an extended vacation with everything being new – including the host university campus as well as the NJ and NY area. Being able to spend a day at a beach wasn’t something I believed I would do so casually and I’d never seriously thought being in NYC would allow me to do that.

Masumi must have been the first Japanese I’d ever met. She was what one would expect a typical citizen of this state in the northwestern Pacific to be: quiet, focused on the task at hand, disciplined. She didn’t participate much in any of the conversations around a dozen participants from different countries were having. But in a private conversation Masumi – which I have to admit I do as well – opened up a lot more and volunteered to be my second interviewee. As we were done with making our own humble contribution to keeping the Coney Island beach clean and enjoyed a burger at an iconic American fast food establishment Nathan’s Famous, we sat down on the beach to have a chat.

Back in Japan Masumi went to «an English immersive school» from Grade 1 to Grade 12 where all the subjects were taught both in Japanese and English. Masumi believes that was how she ended up picking up the language «naturally». At this private school most teachers were from English-speaking countries. Studying there definitely put Masumi in an advantageous position compared to her compatriots who normally start learning English during junior high/middle school through regular English classes focusing on grammar, vocabulary and making simple dialogues. Sadly as Masumi notes, as a result of such an education most ended up not being able to «produce» any English at all.

Detailing on the strengths of her language instruction back in her home country, Masumi remembers how listening was the easiest as she was exposed to English daily in her classroom. Then she gradually learned how to read and write. Unfortunately, speaking was really difficult and, in fact, she still finds herself struggling with it, which has her wondering why she «can listen but can’t produce English’. One of the reasons might have been that all her classmates were Japanese and even teachers who were foreigners could understand English so all interactions were in Masumi’s first language. Besides, she never used English outside school.