Gor. It is my wish to do so.
Doc. In a few words, without ceremony, without indulging in a long speech: cut it short with an apophthegm6; quick, quick, Mr. Gorgibus, make haste, avoid prolixity.
Gor. Suffer me to speak then…
Doc. That's enough Mr. Gorgibus, you speak too much. Somebody else must tell me what was the cause of their quarrel.
Vill. You must know, sir, that …
Doc. You are an ignoramus, an unlearned man, ignorant of all good rules; an ass, in plain English. What! you begin a discourse without a word of exordium! Some one else must tell me what happened; will you, young lady, tell me the particulars of all this noise?
Ang. Do you see here my fat rascal, my wine-barrel of a husband …
Doc. Gently, if you please, speak with respect of your husband when you are under the nose of a doctor like me.
Ang. Ah! I should just think so, doctor! I care little for you or your doctrine, and I am a doctor whenever I please.
Doc. You, a doctor when you please. A nice doctor you make. You seem to me to do much as you wish… But, I say, tell me the subject of your uproar.
Bar. Sir, your honour …
Doc. You begin well. "Your honour!" this word has something flattering to the ear, something full of magniloquence; "your honour!"
Bar. According to my will.
Doc. Quite right… "According to my will!" the will speaks of a wish, the wish presupposes means to come to one's ends, and the end presupposes an object. It is well said, "according to my will!"
Bar. I am bursting with rage.
Doc. Cut out this word "bursting." It is a low, vulgar expression.
Bar. But, doctor, listen to me for mercy's sake.
Doc. Audi, quæso, would Cæsar have said.7
Bar. Seize her, or don't seize her, you will listen to me or I will break your doctoral neck! What the devil do you mean by all this?
(Le Barbouillé, Angélique, Gorgibus, Cathau, Villebrequin, wish to explain the cause of the quarrel; the Doctor explains that peace is a fine thing. They all talk together, and make a dreadful noise. In the midst of all this, Le Barbouillé ties the Doctor by the legs with a rope, throws him down on his back, and drags him away; the Doctor goes on talking all the time, and counts all his arguments on his fingers, as if he were not on the ground.)
Gor. Now, my daughter, go back to your home and live in peace with your husband.
Vill. Your servant; good night.
(Exeunt Villebrequin, Gorgibus, and Angélique.)
SCENE VII. – VALÈRE, LA VALLÉE
Val. I am extremely obliged to you, sir, for the trouble you have taken, and I promise you that in about an hour's time I shall be at the place of rendezvous you give me.
La Val. It cannot be put off so long, in a quarter of an hour the ball will be over, and you will miss the pleasure of meeting there the person you love.
Val. Let us go together then.
(Exeunt Valère and La Vallée.)