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The Unbidden Guest

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CHAPTER XIX. – TO THE TUNE OF RAIN

Towards the close of a depressing afternoon in the following winter Arabella might have been seen (but barely heard) to steal out of the farmhouse by the front door, which she shut very softly behind her. Twilight had set in before its time, thanks to the ponderous clouds that were gathered and still gathering overhead; but as she came forth into the open air, Arabella blinked, like one accustomed to no light at all. Rain had fallen freely during the day, but only, it seemed certain, as a foretaste of what was presently to come. At the moment all was very still, which rendered it the more difficult to make no noise; but this time Arabella was not bound upon any secret or private enterprise. She stepped out naturally enough when a few yards from the house, her simple object being a breath of fresh air; and from her white face and tired eyes, of this she was in urgent need. She picked her way as quickly as possible across the muddy yard, but ere she reached the gate was accosted by Old Willie, who was off duty until milk-cart time in the small hours, and who peered at her with a grave, inquiring look before opening his mouth.

“About the same, Miss?”

She shook her head.

“No better, at any rate; if anything, worse.”

“And Mr. Teesdale?”

“He is keeping up. The woman who is helping me to nurse has a baby. She had to bring it with her. Father plays with it all day, and it seems to occupy his mind.”

“Well, that’s something. Now get your snack of air, miss. I mustn’t keep you.”

“No, you mustn’t. I am going to the Cultivation, it is so high and open there. Do you think it will rain before I can get back?”

Old Willie looked aloft. He was an ancient mariner, who had deserted his ship for the diggings in the early days; hence the aptitude for regular night-work.

“I think we shall catch it before pitch-dark,” said he; “so you’d better look sharp, miss; and – good-night!”

“Good-night; and thank you – thank you.”

But Arabella walked away wincing, and she opened the gate with her left hand; for the horny-fisted old sea-dog had shown his sympathy by nearly breaking her right.

It was the gate that led one among the gum-trees, down into that shallow gully, and so upward to the Cultivation. The trees were as leafy as ever in summer-time; the grass at their feet was much greener. There was no other striking difference to mark the exchange of seasons, saving always the heavy gray sky and the damp raw air. Arabella drew her shawl skin-tight about her shoulders, and walked rapidly; but far swifter than her feet went her thoughts – to last summer.

Heaven knows there were others to think of first – and last – just then. Yet in a minute or two Arabella was thinking only of the wicked, the dishonest, the immoral Missy. Nothing was known of her at the farm from the day she left it. That was nearly eight months ago, and eight months was time enough, surely, to forget her in; but here, of all places, Arabella could never forget the woman who had saved her own woman’s honour. Here it had happened. It was at the Cultivation corner that she had made the tryst that would infallibly have been her ruin; it was somewhere hereabouts that Missy had kept that tryst for her and saved her from ruin. She could never come this way without thinking only of Missy, and wondering whether she was alive, and where she was, and what doing. Therefore that which happened this evening was in reality less of a coincidence than it looked.

The girl of whom she was thinking stood suddenly in Arabella’s path.

The recognition, however, was not so immediate. Missy was clad in garments that were the meanest rags compared even with those in which she had first appeared at the farm; also, she was thin to emaciation, and not a strand of her distinguishing red hair could be seen for the unsightly bonnet which was tightly fastened over her head and ears. Consider, further, the light, and you will have more patience than Missy had with the dumbfounded Arabella.

Don’t you know me, ‘Bella, or won’t you know me?”

Arabella did know her then, and her hands flew out to the other’s and caught them tight. Then she doubted her knowledge – the hands were harder than her own.

“Missy! No, I don’t believe it is you. Where’s your fringe? Why are you – like this? How can it be you? You never used to have hard hands!” Yet she held them tight.

“Don’t talk so loud,” said Missy, nervously; “there might be someone about. You know it’s me. I wonder how you can bear to touch me!”

“I can bear a bit more than that,” said Arabella warmly, and she flung her arms about the other, and reached up and kissed her lovingly upon the mouth, upon both cheeks. The cheeks were cold, and the back and shoulders were wet to the hands and wrists encircling them.

“You’re a good sort, ‘Bella,” murmured Missy, not particularly touched, but in a grateful tone enough. “You always were. There, that’ll do. Fancy you not even being choked off yet – and me like this!”

“Fancy you being back again, Missy! That’s the grand thing. I can hardly credit it even now. But you’re terribly wet, poor dear! It’s dreadful for you, Missy, it is indeed!”

“Oh, that’s nothing; it did rain pretty hard, but there’ll be some more in a minute, so it would come to the same thing in any case.”

“Then you have walked, and were caught in it on the road?”

“Do I look as if I’d ridden? Yes, and it was a pretty long road – ”

“From Melbourne? – I should think it was.” Missy laughed.

“From Melbourne, that’s no distance. I’ve travelled more than twice as far since morning, my dear, and I shall have it to travel all over again before to-morrow morning.”

“Then you haven’t come from Melbourne?” cried Arabella, highly amazed.

“Haven’t set foot in it since I saw you last.”

“Where in the world have you been, then, Missy?”

But even as they were speaking, the grass whispered on every hand, the leaves rustled, and down came the rain in torrents. Arabella found herself taken by the arm and led into the shelter of the nearest tree – a spreading she-oak. She was much agitated.

“Oh, what am I to do?” she cried. “I dare not stay many minutes; but I would give anything to stay ever so long, Missy! You don’t understand. Tell me quickly where you have been, if you never went back to Melbourne?”

“Nay, if you’re in a hurry, it’s you that must tell me things. That’s what I’ve come all this way for, ‘Bella – just to hear how you’re all getting on. How’s Mr. Teesdale?”

“He’s as well as he ever is.”

“And you, ‘Bella?”

“Oh, there’s never anything the matter with me.”

“And John William?”

“There’s not much the matter with him, either.”

“Then that’s all right,” Missy fetched a sigh of relief.

It struck Arabella as very odd indeed that the only one of them after whom Missy did not ask should be Mrs. Teesdale. But was it odd? Quite apart from any rights or wrongs, Mrs. Teesdale had been Missy’s natural enemy from the first. Moreover, she had struck Missy as an old woman who would never grow older or die; and Arabella let it pass. She was in a hurry, and it was now her turn to get answers from Missy.

“Where have you been,” she repeated, “if you never went back to Melbourne? Be quick and tell me all about it.”

Missy shook her head, shaking the rain that had gathered upon her shabby bonnet into Arabella’s eyes. It was raining very heavily all this time, and the she-oak’s shelter left much to be desired. But Missy was now the one with her arms about the other, who was, as we know, a much shorter woman; so that Arabella, whose back was to the tree-trunk, was being kept wonderfully dry. Missy shook her head.

“I can’t tell you much if I’m to tell you quickly. You are in a hurry, I can see, and indeed it’s no wonder – ”

“Oh, you don’t understand, Missy!” cried the other in a torment. “If only you would come into the house – ”

“That I never can.”

“I tell you that you don’t understand. You could – just now.”

“Never,” said Missy firmly. “I know my sins pretty well by this time. I’ve had time to study ‘em lately; and the worst of the lot was how I played it upon all of you here. Now don’t you begin! You want to know where I’ve been lying low all this while, and what I’ve been doing. I’ll tell you in two twos; then I’ll give you what I’ve got for Mr. Teesdale, and then you shall run away indoors, and back I go to the place I come from. Where’s that? Over twenty miles away, in the Dandenong Ranges. It’s a farm like this – What am I saying? There never was or will be a farm like this! But it isn’t so unlike, either, in this and that; and I’m the girl in the kitchen there, same as Mary Jane is here, and help milk the cows, and cook the dinner, and clean up the place, and all that.”

“Oh, Missy, I can scarcely believe it! Yet I felt hard work on your hands the moment I touched them – they are as rough and hard as Mary Jane’s,” said Arabella, taking fresh hold of them, “and your dress is just like hers. Where did you get such a dress? And how did you come to get taken on at the farm? We all thought you’d gone straight back to Melbourne; as for John William – ”

She hesitated. It was one thing to befriend Missy; but Arabella could not help taking a special and a different view of her in relation to her own brother.

“Yes?” said Missy.

“John William was quite sure of it.”

“Then – I suppose – he never thought of looking for me? No, of course he wouldn’t. Why should he?”

“You – you could hardly expect it, dear, I think,” said John William’s sister, very gently.

“Hardly; what a cracked thing it was to say!” cried Missy, laughing down the wistful tone into which she had dropped. “But you none of you could have guessed much about my life there, if you thought I was likely to go straight back to Melbourne from here. No, and you can’t have known what it was to me to have lived here for two months, even as a cheat and a liar. There’s worse things than cheating and lying, ‘Bella; there’s things that cheating and lying’s a healthy change after! But never mind all that. When I left you, and had got through the township, I didn’t take the road to Melbourne at all; I took the other road. Bang ahead of me was them Dandenong Ranges that your dear old father’s always looking at as he sits at the table. I wonder does he look at ‘em as much as ever? So I said, ‘Them ranges is the place for me;’ and I stumped for them ranges straight away. I swopped dresses with a woman I met on the road; this is the rags of what I got for mine; and then I stopped at all the farms asking for work. How I got work, after ever so long, and all about it, I’d tell you if you weren’t in such a hurry to go. You’ll get wet, you know, and here you’re as dry as a bone. But I suppose it’s only natural!”

 

“It isn’t natural, Missy, and it isn’t true,” said Arabella, earnestly. “Oh, if only you understood everything! As if I could ever forget what you did for me – in this very paddock!”

“It was under this very tree, for that matter,” said Missy, with a laugh. “I found it easily enough, and I was standing under it for old acquaintance when you came along. Do you know what he got?”

Arabella hung her head, because in the Argus she had read his sentence, to whom once she had been prepared to commit body and soul. She did not answer; but in her anxiety to be good to Missy, she forgot that other anxiety concerning her brother.

“If only you would come into the house, and let me give you some dry things and some supper! You must need both; and you have no idea how clear the coast is. You don’t understand!”

“What is it that I don’t understand?” asked Missy, pertinently. “You keep on saying that.”

“It is my mother – you never asked after her. She is very ill. She is – on her deathbed.”

For more than a minute Missy remained speechless, while the fall of the rain on leaf and blade seemed all at once to have grown very loud. Then she shook her head firmly.

“I am so sorry for you all; but it’s all the more reason why I mustn’t come in. If she were well, I daren’t.”

They argued the matter. The want of food was admitted; that of dry clothes, obvious.

“If you would only come as far as the cart-shed; there’s not the least chance of anyone going there till Old Willie does at two o’clock in the morning; and there I could bring you some supper and a change as well. If you would only do that,” Arabella urged, “it would be something.”

“You would promise not to tell a soul?”

“I do promise.”

“Not even John William?”

Arabella remembered her forgotten anxiety. “Certainly not John William,” said she, emphatically. And Missy gave in at last.

Five minutes later they stood, wet and dripping, in the cart-shed. It was one of the many more or less ramshackle shanties which stood around the homestead yard. It had a galvanised iron roof, a back and two sides of wattle and dab, and no front at all. And no sooner had the two women gained this shelter than a man’s voice calling through the rain caused them to cling instinctively together. The man was John William, and, low as his voice was purposely pitched, the words carried clear and clean into the cart-shed.

“‘Bella! ‘Bella! Where are you, ‘Bella?”

And the voice was coming nearer.

“I must go,” whispered ‘Bella.

“Remember your promise!”

Missy could not know how superfluous was her caution; it comforted her to remember that she had given it, now that she was left alone, able to think, and to examine the situation. This was not that situation which she had planned and bargained for in her own mind; this was the better of the two. She had intended to waylay Arabella, but she had never hoped to manage it so far from the house. She had contemplated the impossibility of waylaying her at all – the necessity of knocking at her window as she was going to bed – the circumstances of a more difficult and a more dangerous interview than that which had already taken place. She knew the daily ways of the farm well enough to know also that she was tolerably safe at present where she was. Soon Arabella would return with eatables and dry clothing, and the one would be as welcome as the other. Meantime, Missy had hidden herself under the spring-cart, lest by any chance another should look into the shed before Arabella. When the latter came back, she would confide into her safe keeping that which she had brought for Mr. Teesdale, to be given him not before Missy had been twenty-four hours gone from the premises. And after that —

Nothing mattered after that.

But Arabella did not return so very soon, after all; and it was uncomfortable for body and nerves alike, crouching under the spring-cart; and the rain made such an uproar on the iron roof that it would be impossible to hear footsteps outside, came they never so near; and this made it worse still for the nerves.

The cow-shed was not far from that which sheltered buggy and carts and Missy in the midst of them. On a perfectly still evening it would have been possible to hear the jet of milk playing on the side of the pail; but to-night Missy could hear nothing but the rain and her own heart beating. It was raining harder than ever. She crouched, watching the sputtering blackness outside until, very suddenly, it ceased to be absolutely black. The light of a lantern came swinging nearer and nearer to the shed.

“What can she want with a lantern?” thought Missy, shrinking for a moment as the rays reached her. Then she extricated herself from the spring-cart wheels, stood upright, and asked the question aloud when the lantern itself was within a yard or two of the shelter. Now you cannot tell who is carrying the ordinary lantern when the night is dark and there is no other light at all; and Missy never dreamt that this was any person but Arabella, until strong arms encircled her and the breath was out of her body.

At last she gasped —

“Arabella told you! She has broken her sacred promise!”

“No one told me; but I saw it in Arabella’s face… Missy! Missy! To think that I have got you safe! I shall never let you go any more – never – never!”

Suddenly he swept her off her feet and bore her into the rain.

“Where are you going to take me? Not into the house?”

She could scarcely speak; she was quite past struggling. Without answering, he bore her on.

CHAPTER XX. – THE LAST ENCOUNTER

It was in the old parlour, an hour later.

Here the change from summer to winter struck the eye more forcibly than it ever can out-of-doors in a country where no leaves fall. The gauze screen which had fitted in front of the fire-place was put away, and a log fire burnt excellently on the whitened hearth; the room was further lighted by the kerosene lamp that stood as of old upon the table; the gun-room door was shut; and a pair of old green curtains, of a different shade from that of the tablecloth, which looked less green and more faded than ever, were drawn across the window.

Mr. Teesdale sat in his accustomed corner, with his chair pushed back and pointing neither towards the table nor the fire, but between the two. On his knee was a bare-legged child, perhaps fourteen months old. Arabella, when she was in the room, took a chair near the table, if she sat down at all, and the lamplight only blackened the inscription of sleepless nights and anxious days that was cut deep upon her pallid face. John William sat at that end of the sofa which he had invariably affected, watching Missy; they all did this, even to Mr. Tees-dale, who was also occupied with the child upon his knee; but all save the child, who sometimes crowed and was checked, sat more like waxworks in a show than living, suffering beings.

When one spoke, it was in a whisper. But there was very little speaking. If Missy had not come back at all they could scarcely have been more silent.

Yet the way they spoke to her when they spoke at all – the way they looked at her, whether they spoke or not – this was much more remarkable than their silence, for which there was good reason. They spoke to Missy as to an old and valued friend, who had come at a cruel time, but who brought her own welcome even so; they looked at her with hospitable, grieved eyes that entreated her to take the kindly will for the kindlier deed. Across their faces, too, there now and then swept looks of apprehension which she did not see; but never a shade that would have led a stranger to suspect that they knew aught but good of this girl, or that she had rendered aught but kindness to them and theirs.

As for Missy, she did not see half their looks, because her own eyes had been either averted or downcast during the whole of the hour that she had already spent in the room. Now they were averted. She was sitting on a stool by the fireside – by that side of the fire which was furthest from Mr. Teesdale and nearest to the door. Her body was bent forward; her eyes were fixed pensively upon the fire; her left elbow rested upon her knee, and her chin in the hollow of her left hand. Hand and face were brown alike from hard work in all weathers. It was the weather of that day, however, that had quenched the colour from her hair; limp and soaking as it was, it looked much less red than formerly in the glare of midsummer. Also the fringe had disappeared entirely; but this alteration was permanent. Most notable of all changes, however, was the gauntness and angularity of the old good figure, which had struck Arabella even in the darkness; it was painfully conspicuous in the light. Missy had been to her box with Arabella, and was clad in a blouse and skirt that had been made for her ten months earlier. They fitted but loosely now. A hat and jacket, which she had also obtained from her box, had been taken away from her by John William: it lay within reach of his hand upon the sofa, where he appeared content to sit still and stare fixedly at Missy’s back. Thus he was not aware that she had taken a small roll of papers out of her blouse, and that her right hand had been for some time fidgeting with it in her lap. And when David, who had a much better view, broke the silence with a low-toned question, the younger Teesdale had to get up in order to understand what his father meant.

“What is it you have got there, Missy?”

“It is something that I – I wanted to talk to you about, Mr. Teesdale.” She turned her head and looked a little wistfully at John William and Arabella; but neither of these two perceived that she wished to speak to Mr. Teesdale alone; and, after all, there was no reason why she should not speak out in front of them. So she proceeded. “It’s something rather important – it’s the only thing that could ever have brought me back here. Mr. Teesdale, you never took possession of my box after all!”

“‘Twasn’t likely,” said David.

“But I meant you to. I told Arabella – ”

“Yes, yes, but you didn’t really and truly expect me to take you at your word, Missy?”

“Of course I did. The box was yours. It and all that was in it had been bought with your money.”

“I wouldn’t have anybody touch the box,” said David, with characteristic pride. “I took and locked it up myself, and I’ve kept the key in my pocket ever since.”

“But it was all yours by rights – ”

“I care nothing at all about that!”

“The dresses and things, as well as the box itself, were worth something. Not much, perhaps – still, something. And then there were four pounds and some silver which I’d never touched. Here they are – four pounds.”

She got up and laid them in a row on the tablecloth under the lamp. The others had risen also; and John William, for one, had his eyes fixed upon the little roll of paper in her right hand. It was a roll of one-pound notes. She began to lay them one by one upon the table, counting aloud as she did so.

“One, two, three, four, five, six – ”

“Stop a moment,” said David, trembling. “How did you come by them, Missy?”

“Seven, eight. Didn’t I tell you that I’ve been working all this time upon a farm? Nine – ”

“Ah, yes, you did.”

There had been a few explanations – a very few – when John William had first brought her in. Then dry clothes, then supper, then silence. It must be remembered that the shadow of death hung over the farm.

“Ten. I was there thirty-three weeks last Saturday. Eleven. They gave me ten shillings a week, and they found me – twelve – in food and clothes. I had things to put up with – thirteen – but nothing I couldn’t bear. I was thankful you’d taught me to milk here. Fourteen, fifteen. I was so! Sixteen, and that’s the lot. Sixteen and four’s twenty. Twenty pound I got out of you, Mr. Tees-dale, because I couldn’t resist it when you said what you may recollect saying as you drove me back into Melbourne that first day. I never meant to pay you back; I wasn’t half sure that I’d ever let you see me again. I don’t say I should have done it if I’d known you’d go and pawn your watch for me; still I did do you out of the twenty pounds, and I meant to do you out of them for good and all. But here they are.”

 

“Thank you, Missy,” said David at last. The others said nothing at all.

“Thank me! I don’t want you to thank me at all. What have I done but rob you and pay you back again? No – I only want you – to forgive me – if you can!”

“I do forgive you, my dear; but I forgave you long ago,” said David, smoothing back her hair and kissing her upon the forehead.

“You two forgive me, I know,” she said, turning to the others.

Arabella embraced her tearfully, but John William only laughed sardonically. What had he to forgive?

“I knew you did. So now there is only one thing more that I want to send me away happy.”

“Send you away! Where to? You’ve only just come,” cried Mr. Teesdale, as loud as he dared; but even as he spoke he remembered the special difficulty of the occasion, and his face twitched with the pain. “Why, where did you think of going to?” he added, wiping his lips with his red pocket-handkerchief.

“Back to the Dandenong Ranges. I’m so happy there, you don’t know! Thought I’d left? Not me, don’t you believe it. No, I must get back to my work as quick as I can. And you’ll be able to sit in quietness and look out through the gun-room window” – she pointed to the gun-room door – “and across the river-timber to them blue ranges, and you’ll be able to say, ‘Missy’s working there. She’s honest now, whatever she was once; and she’s trying to make up for her whole life.’ Yes, and you may say, ‘She’s trying to make up for it all, and it was us that taught her; it was us that took her out of hell and gave her a glimpse of the other thing!’ That’s what you’ll be able to say, Mr. Teesdale. And I’ll know you’re looking at the ranges, and I’ll think you’re looking at me, every evening in the summer-time, and every dinner-time all the year round. They ain’t so blue as they look, when you get there – I guess the sky isn’t either when you get there– but they’re blue enough for Missy; they’re blue enough for me.”

The tears were running down her face. John William had interjected, here and there, “You’re never going back at all.” But she had taken no notice of him; and when he repeated the same speech now, she shook her head and only sobbed the more.

“What is it that would send you away happy?” asked poor David; for he knew well what the answer was to be; and by now he was himself intensely agitated.

“I want someone else to forgive me, too,” said Missy, “if it is not too late.” And she looked at the door that led into the passage that led to Mrs. Tees-dale’s room. This door, also, was kept carefully closed.

“It is too late for you to see her; it would not be safe,” said Mr. Teesdale, sadly shaking his head. “But she lies yonder at peace with all mankind; she has told me so herself. Rest assured that she forgives you, Missy.”

“She would forgive you with all her heart,” said Arabella. “She has been so brave and good – and gentle – ever since she first fell ill. She would forgive you, Missy, as freely as my father has done.”

“She has forgiven you long ago,” declared John William. “She spoke to me about you the morning after she had been to see the doctor without telling us she was going. She spoke of you then without any bitterness; so she had forgiven you as long ago as that.”

Missy received these optimistic assurances with a look of dissatisfied doubt, as though she could accept no forgiveness that was not actual and absolute. Then her eyes found their way back to the passage door; and she could scarce believe them. She sprang backward with a cry of fear. The other three started also with one accord – so that the room shook. For the door was open, and on the threshold, like a spectre, stood none other than the dying woman herself.

“Forgive you!” she said, in a crazy rattle of a voice. “You!”

She entered without stumbling, shut the door behind her, and took two steps forward. They appeared the steps of a decrepit, rather than a dying woman; but they brought her no nearer to Missy, who backed in terror towards the gun-room. Nor was poor Missy worse than any of the rest, who not one of them could put out a hand to uphold this tottering, terrible figure, so scared and shaken were they. And the old woman stood there in her bedclothes, with a ghastly dew upon her emaciated face, and ordered the young girl out of the house.

“Forgive you!” she said. “Go; how dare you come back? David – all of you – how dare you take her in – a common slut – with me on my deathbed? How long have you had her here, I wonder? Not long, I know, or I should ha’ felt it – I should ha’ known! Do you think I could have died in my bed with that – with that in the house? God forgive you all; and you, out you go. Do you hear? Go!”

She pointed to the gun-room door with a bony, quivering hand; and because the girl she abhorred was paralysed with horror, she brought that hand down passionately upon the table, so that the four sovereigns rang together, and she saw the gold and notes, and fiercely inquired where they came from.

But now at last David was supporting her in his arms, and he answered soothingly:

“They are twenty pounds that Missy borrowed from me when she was with us – I never told you about it. She has come to-night and paid them back to me. That’s the only reason she is here. She has been all this time earning them, just to do something to atone.”

“Pah!” cried Mrs. Teesdale, stiffening herself in her husband’s arms, and reaching her skinny hands to the notes and gold. “How came you to have twenty pounds to give her? How comes she to have them to give you back? How do you think she earned them? Shall I tell you how?” the poor woman screamed. “They’re the wages of sin – the wages of sin – of sin!” She snatched up gold and notes alike and flung the lot at the fire with all her feeble might. The gold went ringing round the whitened hearth. The notes fell short.

“Now go,” she said to Missy, her scream dropping to a whisper, “and come back at your peril.”

Missy got her hat and jacket from the sofa, brushing the wall all the way, and never taking her eyes from that awful, menacing, death-smitten face. Then suddenly she plucked up courage, took one step forward, and stood in profound humility, mutely asking for that forgiveness which she was never to get. A strong hand, young Teesdale’s, had laid hold of her arm from behind and given her strength.

David, too, was putting in a quavering word for her.

“She is going,” said he. “She was going in any case. You are wrong about the money. She has earned it honestly, as a farm servant, like our Mary Jane. Can’t you see how brown her face and hands are? We have all forgiven her, as we hope to be forgiven. Cannot you also forgive her, my dear, and let her go her ways in peace?”

The sick woman wavered, and for a moment the terrible gaze, transfixing Missy, turned, by comparison, almost soft. Then it shifted and fell upon the bearded face of him who was supporting the unhappy girl, and moment, mood and chance were gone, all three, beyond redemption.

“John William,” said his mother, “leave her alone. Do you hear me? Let her go!”

Nothing happened.

“Let her go!” screamed Mrs. Teesdale. “Choose once and for all between us – your dying mother and – that – woman!”