Instant Family

Chapter Two

Frankie wondered anxiously if she should approach him. Although she knew he shouldn’t be unattended, she had no idea how he would react to her. Where was Ben? Still, she had worked as an aide in a senior-care home since Rae was six, and almost by instinct she found herself moving toward Ben’s father.

Just before she reached him, a plump woman sporting a large name tag that proclaimed her as a Nature Center volunteer, stepped between them and said rather officiously, “Please don’t touch the displays, sir.”

Ben’s father weaved his head a bit like he was trying to focus on a faraway noise, and then he gave the standing bear, with its ferocious grimace, a little pat.

“I said don’t touch, sir!” the volunteer said more sharply. “Please step away!”

Ben’s father looked confused and his tongue darted out the corner of his mouth. Suddenly Frankie had that swell of feeling she sometimes got at the care home—the one when she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

In another moment, though, any inclination to laugh was shoved aside abruptly.

The volunteer reached out and clasped his forearm.

Ben’s father’s eyes widened in shock and rage; his mouth flew open and a horrible cry came out of it. Then he shoved her with all of his might, causing her to lose her balance, stagger back a few steps and topple a display of pert-looking chipmunks.

Even before she could get to her feet, the volunteer was fumbling for her phone as she threatened to call Security.

Frankie’s eyes darted around and found Rae, who looked utterly stricken. She tried to smile reassuringly at her, but felt torn between going to soothe her daughter and staying to help Ben’s father.

Rae would have to understand, Frankie told herself. If she saw her mother being strong and helping someone when it was the right thing to do, it would benefit both of them.

The other patrons at the Nature Center had drifted awkwardly away from the scene, although, Frankie noted with wryness, they stayed close enough to see how things were going to unfold. She headed toward Ben’s father to offer assistance.

“Dad!” Ben’s voice drew her attention. He hurried toward them with a look of relief seasoned with a dash of frustration.

“Dad, I’m so glad you’re safe.” Temporarily unmindful of the chaos around him, Ben put his hands on his father’s shoulders and looked into his eyes before drawing him into a hug.

His flare of violent temper gone, Ben’s father subsided into his son’s arms like a docile child.

“I like animals,” he said softly.

“I know you do, Dad. I know. But you have to wait for me to bring you here. You can’t just disappear on me.”

While Ben spoke patiently to his father, Frankie watched a slight pulse at the corner of his eye that indicated how stressful the incident had been for him.

“So, I assume you’re the one responsible for this—this gentleman?” The volunteer had struggled to her feet and directed her question to Ben.

“He’s my father,” Ben replied. “Most folks know us around here,” he said, attempting to be friendly and smooth things over. “So, I take it you’re new? How long have—”

“Well, I suggest you keep him under control,” she said, “before he hurts someone else.”

“He didn’t mean to hurt you,” Ben said. “He’s just...”

“He’s crazy is what he is!”

Something flared in Frankie and she stepped forward.

“These gentlemen happen to be very good friends of mine,” she declared. “And I can assure you that he’s about the furthest thing from crazy that you could ever want! Perhaps you need to work on how you approach your visitors so that you don’t offend them.”

She looked at Ben, whose befuddled expression would have made her giggle under different circumstances. Obviously, nothing in their brief acquaintance would have prepared him for the declaration that they were close friends. Fortunately, the volunteer’s focus wasn’t on him at the moment.

“Let’s go,” Frankie said to Ben and his father, who clung to his son’s hand and studied his feet. “Come on, Rae, we’re going back to the cabins.”

Rae chewed her lip, a sign that she was very puzzled. But she took her mother’s hand and the four of them left together.

Once outside, Ben held his father by the hand and hurried up beside Frankie and murmured, “I suppose I should say thank you, but would you mind telling me what that was all about?”

“I work with seniors,” she said, “and I knew your dad needed help. Besides, I hate labels like that.”

“Like ‘crazy’?”

She nodded.

They walked together for a little while, not saying anything.

Frankie took in the eclectic shops ranging from a hairdresser to a sporting-goods store to a small art gallery. She loved the smell of the air and seeing the tall pine trees.

“My dad used to be a minister,” Ben offered quietly. “He was one of the kindest, wisest men you’d ever want to meet.” Sadness and another expression that Frankie couldn’t quite decipher flickered across his face.

Ben’s father had let go of his hand and walked beside Rae, slightly in front of them. “I’m Al,” Frankie heard him tell Rae. “Who are you?”

Frankie wasn’t sure how Rae would react, both because of the unusual situation and because she had become much more reticent since her dad had left. But she just looked shyly up at Al and shuffled her feet a bit. “I’m Rae,” she told him.

The two of them continued to stroll together in what looked like a compatible silence.

Rae was an intuitive little girl, and she could probably sense that Al didn’t mean any harm, despite what she had seen at the Nature Center.

She also noticed Ben’s stiff shoulders loosen slightly. His handsome face no longer looked as agitated as it had, but still wore deep shadows of the devastating kind of fatigue she knew could overcome long-term caregivers: the kind of fatigue people had when they knew things would only get worse.

“What about your mother?” Frankie asked. “Do you have any brothers or sisters to help out?” She avoided asking him why he hadn’t placed his father in permanent care. She knew that the decision to do so was very complex, colored by each family’s experiences and emotions.

She also wasn’t going to ask if he was married and why his wife wasn’t with him if he was. It was none of her business and she certainly didn’t care. She had noticed that he wasn’t wearing a ring, but these days that didn’t mean anything.

“Mom died two years ago,” Ben said. “Ovarian cancer.”

“I’m so sorry. It’s horrible watching someone go through that.”

“I was away,” Ben said tersely, in a tone that clearly indicated he wanted no further questions. He reached up and brushed his hair off his forehead. Frankie found herself wondering why she’d never been attracted to a man with light hair before. Trevor’s hair had been dark.

“Is something the matter?” Ben asked, catching her gaze.

Frankie felt her cheeks flush. “No,” she said shortly.

After another moment, he said quietly. “I’m glad Mom never had to see Dad like this.”

She nodded. She understood there was nothing to say.

“As for your other question, I’m an only child so it’s just Dad and me now.”

“It’s just Rae and me,” Frankie heard herself say, and inwardly cringed a little. She didn’t tell people personal things about herself, especially men. She just didn’t. She rapidly changed the subject. “I’m sure your dad appreciates you, even if he can’t always tell you.”

For a moment weariness and something darker shadowed Ben’s features.

“It’s the least I can do,” he said.

He glanced over at Al and Rae and said, “Is your daughter okay with him, do you think? I don’t want her to be uncomfortable.”

Throughout her conversation with Ben, Frankie had been able to hear the light, gentle notes of her daughter’s voice, telling Al that she liked Sunday school and that she was allergic to peanuts.

“She’s doing fine,” she said, and was pleasantly surprised herself. Maybe Rae paid more attention than Frankie thought when she talked about her work and how important it was to treat seniors with dignity.

“Anyway,” Ben said, “before Dad wandered off, we did go to the office and I got everything straightened out. I asked Paula—she’s the manager—to open the cabin and, thankfully, there isn’t any damage to the inside. Dad and I are fine to stay there and they’ll get cleanup crews for the outside damage as soon as they can. Our cabin is clean for you.”

“You didn’t have to do that,” Frankie said again.

“It’s already done.” His tone brooked no argument.

Well, Frankie reasoned to herself, she could accept it for Rae’s sake. Even if the inside of the cabin was fine, she knew it wouldn’t feel right to sleep in a cabin that had been vandalized whether for reasons of mischief or true malice.

“You said there’d been vandalism around here,” she said. “Do you think it’s safe for us to stay here?” Her head began to drum out an ache and her nerves to strum an accompaniment as she thought of her parents’ generosity and the promises she had made to Rae. Ben appeared to give his answer careful consideration.

“It’s disturbing,” he said, “and it’s getting very expensive for the town—all the cleaning supplies and fresh paint. But I honestly don’t think anyone is in any danger.”

Frankie nodded, pondering.

“Does anyone have any idea who’s doing it?”

Ben shrugged in frustration. “No one is saying for sure, but I think there are some kids in the town whose parents have a little too much money but not quite enough time to give them.”

Frankie had been so absorbed in their conversation that she was surprised when she spotted the Nature Center again and realized they had walked in a circle.

Ben chuckled a bit ruefully as he noticed the same thing.

“Dad likes to walk,” he said. “It helps calm him. If you don’t mind, we could make another loop, and this time I’ll show off my tour-guide skills.”

Frankie sensed the effort Ben was making to be hospitable and how difficult it must be for him to find balance in his life. A tiny piece of armor fell from her heart.

“Are you okay to walk a bit more?” she asked Rae.

“Sure,” Rae answered cheerily. “Al and I are having a good chat.”

Frankie was happy that Rae was comfortable. It was what she wanted for her daughter. But she couldn’t help wondering how any kind of attachment to their summer neighbors—even a minor one—would impact their time and her own aspirations.

* * *

Later, while Ben scrambled eggs for supper on one of the cabin’s hot plates back in what had been Frankie’s cabin, he reflected on the interesting turn the day had taken. Scrambled eggs were one of Al’s favorites, but it wasn’t really his dad that Ben thought about as he pushed the eggs around the pan and opened the fridge to locate the bread. He was grateful that the Lord had kept his father safe today, and he was surprised at the role Frankie had played.

He thought about how her direct gaze seemed to compel him to do things like give up his cabin. He wished he knew more of Frankie’s story, but sensed that she would be very reluctant to share it.

Someone had hurt her and that little girl of hers, of that much he was sure. Despite Frankie’s tough exterior, her pretense of not wanting to accept favors from anyone, Ben sensed a longing that hung around her like a cloak. He could identify with that. No matter how different the reasons were behind it, he was absolutely sure they both carried the burden of regret.

He had no doubt that she would do anything to protect her daughter, but from the way she had readily stepped forward to defend his dad, it seemed that her protective instincts didn’t stop at Rae.

She possessed a complexity of traits and Ben realized that he found that very appealing. The kinds of women he had always dated were the ones he had grown up with at church. They had all known each other from the time they had been angels and shepherds in the Christmas pageant, through youth groups and confirmation classes, all the way to some of them getting married and having kids. He had been on good enough terms with all of them, but there hadn’t been a single one he could have envisioned a future with. Maybe that was because he had always felt as if he was playing a role—the role of the pastor’s son.

He was thirty and had never married. He had never met a woman who he felt he could be completely himself with. Then he had been called to do missionary work, or at least what he told himself was the call. Now, with all he was coping with and preparing for in regard to his father, it was the last thing on his mind.

Ben put Al’s favorite mug on the table, the one with the picture of a fat Canada goose on it, and poured chocolate milk into it. The rather smug look on the goose’s face always made him chuckle.

“What are you laughing at, son?”

Ah, there it was. Ben stopped short against the tormenting bliss of it. It was one of those rare moments of lucidity—he had heard other caregivers talk of it—when your loved one returned for a moment to being the person you had known.

He swallowed and said, “I was just looking at this.” He pointed to the goose. “Supper’s almost ready. Are you hungry?”

As quickly as it came, Al slipped back behind the gray gauze where no one could reach him. He stamped his foot and waved his arms at his son.

“Nope! Nope!”

Ben managed to get him to sit down and put ketchup on his scrambled eggs the way Al liked it. He bowed his head and gave thanks for their supper.

“Amen,” Al said dutifully. There were some things he always remembered.

Despite his best efforts to push the thought to the back of his mind, Ben’s stomach roiled at the images of the care facility that would be necessary by the end of the summer. He watched his father eat without much appetite himself.

Bits of conversation and laughter drifted in from other cabins. Ben could hear the sound of bikes going down the path and of music playing in the distance. He wondered what Frankie and Rae were having for supper. Probably something more exciting than scrambled eggs, he mused.

But he had to ask himself why he was thinking about her. Clearly she had walls as thick as cement and he had enough to deal with right now. He also suspected that her life was consumed with her own worries and concerns.

A loud squeak of dismay permeated the air. Was that Frankie? Ben half rose from his chair.

“It’s okay! We’ve got this!” Yes, that was her voice, no doubt reassuring Rae about something. There was a clatter and an audible gasp.

Ben couldn’t help himself—he had to look out the door and see what was going on.

He watched from the doorway as Frankie made a valid attempt to light the barbecue grill on their deck. The flames went from nonexistent to a fiery roar.

It would embarrass her if he went right out there, Ben reasoned. Besides, if he was being totally honest with himself, he found himself caught up in just watching her. Finding her as attractive as he did unsettled him, but he couldn’t help it.

That brief moment when he had thought she was a boy had completely disappeared into the land of the absurd. In her blue jean shorts and light plaid blouse, she was indisputably feminine. No longer under the ball cap, her hair was pulled up into a ponytail that swayed and bounced and almost seemed to have a personality of its own as Frankie leaned closer to the flames and then jumped back again. It was a deep auburn color, with the sun kissing it here and there into shades of strawberry blonde.

“Maybe Ben can help us?” Ben heard Rae offer.

“Ben?” Frankie stopped her maneuverings and put her hands on her hips. “No, honey, we’re not going to ask him for any more help.”

She stood with her hands anchored to her hips and her legs slightly apart, and looked around as if hoping the solution would come by carried on the breeze.

When her eyes fell on Ben, she froze. Then her cheeks flushed pink.

“How long have you been there?” she asked.

Chapter Three

“Not long,” Ben said. He knew she didn’t want to be seen as incompetent “I heard a noise and I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“I’m fine.”

Ben looked at her, looked at the raging fire and back at her again. His mouth twitched as he tried to suppress a grin.

“I can see that,” he said with mock seriousness.

“Are you laughing at me?” She still looked upset, but he could tell that she was also starting to see the humor in the situation.

“I would never do that,” Ben said in an overly solemn tone, placing his hand on his heart with a dramatic gesture.

Rae giggled heartily, and they both turned to look at her.

Frankie’s face was wreathed in pleased surprise. “I haven’t heard that sound for a while,” she admitted, and then snapped her mouth shut as if to keep herself from revealing more.

“Mom, can he please just start the fire for us?” Rae begged. “I’m totally starving and then we could probably eat in, like, ten minutes.”

“Your daughter’s pretty smart,” Ben said. “She makes a lot of sense for—an eight-year-old?” he guessed.

“I’m ten,” Rae corrected him, fixing him with a flat look that made him chuckle again. It was abundantly clear what she thought of his age-guessing abilities.

“Now what’s funny?” Frankie asked.

“Nothing... It’s just that her expression reminded me very much of you.”

“How can you say that when you don’t even know me,” Frankie retorted.

Oh, but somehow he felt like he did, Ben thought. And he didn’t want to because he didn’t need his life to get more complicated.

He clapped his hands together, briskly, and said, “How about it? I could show you how to manage this temperamental beast now, and next time it’s all you.”

“Well, I guess so,” Frankie agreed reluctantly. “But then you and your dad must join us for supper because you’ve already done enough for us. That is, if you haven’t already eaten.”

“We just started eating,” Ben said. He did a quick check over his shoulder at Al, who was flattening his eggs with his fork, but still in his chair.

“Well...” Frankie hesitated.

“Mom!” demanded Rae.

“Listen to your daughter,” Ben urged.

A few minutes later, he had the flames licking and spitting at a reasonable rate, having been careful to explain to Frankie what he had done.

Ben felt inordinately pleased when Frankie quickly mastered the fire as he had shown her, and cautioned himself not to get too involved.

* * *

Within a few weeks at Silver Lake, Frankie and Rae had fallen into a comfortable rhythm, the kind that Frankie had almost forgotten could exist since everything at home reminded her of what they had lost. Here, in this new setting, she found that looking ahead, rather than back, was starting to feel more natural.

Early in the morning, Frankie took her coffee out onto the deck while Rae was still sleeping and enjoyed the way the day quietly unfolded before more people began to stir. She loved the smell of the pine from the trees and the fresh wind off the lake. Occasionally, a smattering of other early risers passed by, with morning newspapers under their arms, as they headed down to get coffee and sit at the tables in front of the Beachfront Confectionery and bakeshop. They waved and smiled in greeting, and Frankie waved and smiled back.

Previously, the early mornings and the peaceful setting would have been an opportune time to do a morning devotional, but she knew it would take more time for her to make progress in that area.

She was grateful that, slowly but surely, her daughter was taking steps out of the cave she had created for herself. She loved the beach and the Nature Center and going for ice cream. Rae had started to make observations again, with her artist’s eye, commenting on colors and the proximity of shapes and textures—solid rocks at the edge of the ever-changing water; mossy grass swallowing up the bark-rough base of a tree—and Frankie dared to hope that a full-fledged return to her art was imminent.

But Rae was also, in Frankie’s opinion, just a little too fond of wanting to know what Ben and Al were doing. It was a frequent reminder to Frankie that she wasn’t nearly as oblivious to her summer neighbor as she wanted to be—as she needed to be.

She’d have to be blind not to notice how good-looking Ben was with those dark blue eyes that provided such great contrast to the wheat and sunshine of his hair. But she wasn’t going to think about that.

She also wasn’t going to think about his rugged chin or the funny expression he got when he was trying not to laugh.

The screen door of the cabin banged and startled her.

“What time is it?” Rae asked, poking her head out of the door.

“It’s early, Sweet Pea, really early. What are you doing up?”

Frankie looked affectionately at her daughter, wearing her SpongeBob pajamas, her hair a fuzzy cloud around her face.

“I’m excited for today.”

“Today?” Frankie teased, “Hmm, what’s today?”

“Mom!”

Frankie winked at her and reached out an arm to pull her in for a little side hug.

“I know. But you’ll have to be excited for a little while longer. The Nature Center doesn’t even open for a couple more hours. You’ll have to find something to keep you busy until then.”

The day before, when they had visited the Nature Center, there was a sign advertising that anyone interested could go there to learn about how the displays were put together and then how to make displays of their own.

It had warmed Frankie’s heart to see Rae’s enthusiasm. Maybe it was true, she mused, that there was something healing about the lake. Did she dare to hope that it could do the same for her? If she could be satisfied that Rae was back to her ardent, artistic self, would Frankie then feel free to unearth the dreams in her own heart?

Rae bounced up and down a little. “Can I have something for breakfast?”

“If you’re hungry, you know where the cereal and milk are, or there’s toast.”

Her daughter wrinkled her snub nose. “That’s boring.”

“Well, it’s what we’ve got.” Frankie gave her one more squeeze and stood up to stretch and take her coffee cup in for a refill.

“What time do you think Ben and Al will get up?” Rae looked in the direction of their cabin.

The cleaning crews had done their best and the side of the cabin looked much better than it had, but a gray dinginess still lurked as a reminder under the fresh paint. There also continued to be graffiti that showed up randomly on other cabins and buildings. No one knew who the culprit or culprits were, or if they did, they weren’t saying. Frankie wondered if Ben was right about the rich parents and their children who had too much time to get into trouble. She didn’t like the way it hummed like an out-of-tune buzzing underneath the harmony of the summer days.

“Mom!” Rae tugged her hand, letting her know she hadn’t been listening.

Oh yes, Ben and Al...again.

Frankie was going to try this one more time. “Look, Sweet Pea, I think that Ben and his dad probably want some quiet time to enjoy the summer. Remember that Al is sick.”

“He doesn’t look sick.”

“Well, it isn’t the kind of sick that you can always see.” Frankie tried to think of a way to explain. “I told you that Al has Alzheimer’s disease.”

Rae shifted from one foot to the other. “Is that when people forget stuff?”

“Well, that’s mostly what people think of when they hear about Alzheimer’s, and that does happen. It’s kind of like when you have all the pieces of a puzzle and you just can’t think of how to make them fit together. Al might recognize a lot of the things around him but when he tries to put it into a whole picture it doesn’t make sense to him, and that’s why he gets upset sometimes.”

“Because he’s scared?” Rae asked very softly.

“Yes, Sweet Pea, that’s exactly right.”

After a few seconds of silence Rae asked, “Will Nana and Pops get it?”

Frankie thought of her parents. They were probably up early, too, and working in their garden. They were both healthy, but one never knew for sure. Ben had said he’d thought his father would be the last person to suffer from it.

“I don’t think that’s something we need to worry about today,” she said. “Now, why don’t you go get your breakfast and pick out the clothes you’re going to wear.”

Frankie followed Rae inside and decided to forgo another cup of coffee and have a glass of water instead. After she made sure that Rae had what she needed, she went back onto the deck, taking the morning newspaper with the hope of absorbing herself in the crossword puzzle.

Outside she saw Ben across the way on their deck and she considered dashing back inside again before he spotted her. But it was too late. He lifted his coffee mug in a kind of salute. Then he pointed at himself and at her, with his eyebrows raised in a question, asking if he could join her.

Frankie groaned under her breath. Naturally, she thought wryly, first thing in the morning and he had to look like a male model advertising the virtues of the great outdoors. She didn’t even want to think of what she must look like to him with her bedhead hair and her grubby lounge wear. She wished she could say no and go back inside, but she couldn’t think of a way to do it now without it being rude.

* * *

Ben had purposely got up early to get some quiet time in before his day was taken over by his father’s constant needs. When he spotted Frankie on her own deck, he guessed that she, too, must need the quiet. He could only imagine that single-mom duties could easily overtake her day, as well. But the next thing he knew, he was asking to join her, almost as if he had no will of his own. Or was he just using her as a pleasant distraction from the regrets that almost constantly haunted him?

“Ah, the morning crossword puzzle,” Ben said. He spotted the pencil in her hand. “Not brave enough to do it in ink?” he teased her.

She fixed him with what he’d already begun to think of as “the Frankie face” and said, deadpan, “I don’t want to show off.”

Ben made himself at home in the other chair and took a sip of his coffee.

“Is Rae still asleep?”

“No, she’s inside having breakfast and getting ready. I wish she had slept in a bit later,” Frankie confessed. “I signed her up for those classes at the Nature Center and she’s pretty excited about it.”

Ben nodded his acknowledgment. From Frankie’s expression, it was evident that she was happy Rae had something to look forward to.

“Dad used to love crossword puzzles,” he mused. “He was really good at them, too.”

“You said he was a minister?” Frankie asked. “Have you followed in his footsteps?”

“No.” Ben shook his head. Many things rushed through his mind that he could offer as a way of explanation, but he decided to stick with the basic facts. “I’m a general contractor, but I did want to do something worthwhile, so I’ve been on a few mission trips to help with construction and repairs. I also did a bit of work with literacy programs. It was great sharing Jesus with people in a way that felt natural to me.”

Frankie didn’t say anything, and after a moment she looked down at her crossword puzzle. “What’s a five-letter word for angry?”

The deliberate change in conversation didn’t slip by Ben. Tread carefully, he reminded himself, for his own sake as well as hers. He was curious about her faith and sensed that it was a struggle for her, but he had his own struggles. A Christian upbringing didn’t mean faith was always easy. Sometimes, he thought, it actually made it more difficult.

Ben returned his thoughts to the question. “What does it start with?” he asked.

“I”

“Irate?”

Frankie considered it. “Yes, that works.” She wrote the word in carefully.

“So, Rae likes the Nature Center,” Ben said. “How do you plan to keep yourself busy for the next couple of months?”

It was hard, he mused, to make casual conversation when the thought of how appealing she looked floated up like a ginger ale bubble in him.

She tucked her hair behind her ears. In the morning light, the color looked like a sunrise.

“I like to walk and look at things,” Frankie told him. “I enjoy sitting down by the water to watch the waves and think.”

He had the distinct impression that she had much more planned than that, but her expression was closed, not allowing further questions.

“My mom was a schoolteacher,” he shared, sensing it would be better to talk about other things. “What about your parents? Are they both...?”

“Alive, yes,” she said. “And, thankfully, they’re healthy, too. We all live in Regina. It’s about a six-hour drive from here.”

“We’re from Saskatoon,” Ben said. “Is this your first time here at the lake?”

Frankie nodded. “I’d heard good things about it. I figured it sounded like a perfect place for us to...” Ben could almost see her swallowing a word. “For us to have fun,” she finished.

Ben gave a rueful chuckle. “I guess I’m hoping that something here will still be meaningful to Dad. I’m quite certain this will be our last trip here together.” It surprised him that he had said the words out loud, but somehow having them fall on other ears took away a trace of the sting in his throat.

They sat in silence for a moment. Frankie put down her pencil. Through the window screen, they could hear Rae humming to herself.

“She likes it here,” Frankie said with a smile that softened her face.

“You’re a good mom,” Ben said. He felt those words were inadequate, but it was the best he could come up with.

“Thank you. I try.”

Frankie studied her hands, then set her gaze directly on him.

“I do my best. It hasn’t been easy for us on our own.” She lifted her chin and her expression told Ben that she wasn’t providing any more details—not now and maybe not ever.