Special Deliveries: Wanted: A Mother For His Baby: The Nanny Trap / The Baby Deal / Her Real Family Christmas

“Crush?” Bella’s voice wobbled when she tried to sound indignant. “I don’t have a crush on Blake.”

“I think you do. Imagine all those lovely moonlit nights in the Hamptons. Perfect for romantic walks on the beach. A midnight swim, just the two of you. Clothing optional.” Deidre’s eyebrows wagged suggestively. “You’d fall hard for the guy before the first week was over.”

“Midnight swims? Romantic walks?” Bella gave a disgusted snort. “Not likely. I’ll be sacked out. Exhausted from taking care of Drew all day, and Blake will be attending parties. Now that he’s single again, he’ll be swamped with invitations.” Bella could see she wasn’t getting through to her friend. “Besides, there’s never been any hint of attraction between us.”

“Of course not. He was married.”

“He was in love with his wife. For all I know, he still is. They haven’t even been divorced two months. I’m sure he isn’t ready to move on.”

“Keep telling yourself that, and when Blake suggests a nightcap one night after you put Drew to bed, call me the next morning so I can say I told you so.”

To Bella’s dismay, a delicious, forbidden anticipation began to build. Crossing her arms over her chest, she felt the rapid pace of her heart and tried to ignore her body’s troubling reaction to Deidre’s warning. It was ridiculous to imagine Blake being interested in her. Her own feelings were more difficult to dismiss.

“That won’t happen.”

“It might if you spend much time around him.”

“Any time we spend together will be with Drew for company. Nothing is going to happen between us.”

“A baby in the house isn’t going to stop a man like Blake Ford from taking what he wants.” Deidre raised her eyebrows suggestively.

“That’s not Blake’s style.” As tempting as it was to ponder whether Deidre was onto something, Bella knew better than to indulge in daydreams. “Blake and Drew are a package deal and he knows I’m not interested in having a family. He’ll find someone who wants the same things he does.”

“I think you’re kidding yourself if you believe you’ll ever be happy without children of your own and a man at your side to share the responsibility with you.”

Bella shook her head. “I’m sure my mother thought the same thing when she married my dad. But what happens when the responsibility gets to be too much for the two of you to handle?”

“So marry someone wealthy. Then you’d have staff to take care of your every desire, not to mention your kids.” Having delivered her final bit of wisdom, Deidre retreated down the hall, leaving Bella to ponder her roommate’s advice.

Would she be as reluctant to have children if money wasn’t an issue? Bella had no clear answer. On the day she’d turned fifteen and had to spend her birthday in the emergency room because her two youngest siblings had stuck M&M’S up their noses on her watch, she’d decided she never wanted the responsibility of motherhood. Her opinion didn’t change through college or the next few years of teaching when she’d moved away from the farm, although she continued to lend her family what support she could by sending money home. But it was never enough.

The emotions stirred up by her pregnancy had called into question a decade of wanting nothing but her freedom. She’d been plagued by doubts. Questioned her choices. But after Drew’s birth, she’d decided that she’d been a victim of pregnancy hormones. Her heart continued to hurt at the absence of Drew from her life, but she knew he was part of a loving family that had his best interests at heart.

Only today she’d discovered that he might have a father who loved him dearly, but the woman who was supposed to be his mother had turned her back on him. Disgust rose at Victoria’s actions. If Bella had suspected how things would turn out, she never would have agreed to carry Drew for Blake and his wife.

So what was Bella’s responsibility to the child now? With Victoria out of the picture, Bella could be a part of Drew’s life. Was that what she wanted? To be half in his life, always there, but never truly belonging? Blake had wanted her in his son’s life before. But how long would it last? What happened when he remarried? Surely his next wife wouldn’t want her around any more than his last one had.

There were no easy answers.

“So you’re going to do it.” Deidre shook her head as she came back into the room.

“I have to.” Bella wished her friend would understand.

“You’re going to miss a fabulous summer here. A friend of my brother works the door at that new club everyone has been talking about. He said he can get us in whenever we want.”

Disappointment stirred. The reason she’d stayed in New York City was so she could enjoy being young and not have to be responsible for anyone but herself. Last summer she’d been pregnant, so this year she’d been looking forward to dancing the night away at the clubs. Sleeping late. Reading in the park. Being Drew’s nanny meant she wouldn’t get to do any of that.

But she’d have a week in the Caribbean to look forward to. And she had to help her sister.

“That club sounds like it’s going to be so much fun. I wish I could be here to enjoy it with you.”

“Then tell Blake to forget it. You don’t have to make everyone around you happy all the time.”

“I know that.”

“But you never put yourself first. Does your family even appreciate all the things you do for them?”

Bella’s spine stiffened. “They aren’t taking advantage of me.” This wasn’t the first time Deidre had criticized her for helping her family. Being an only child, she didn’t understand why Bella couldn’t ignore that her family needed her help. She might feel anxious about working for Blake this summer, but she was willing to do it for Katie. “Look, if I can help my sister and go to the British Virgin Islands later this year, it will be worth spending a couple months as Drew’s nanny.”

Deidre stepped forward, her expression contrite. “I’m sorry if I made you feel bad. You know what you’re doing. Let’s go out tonight. You can borrow my new Michelle Mason dress. We’ll celebrate the end of the school year and three months of freedom.”

“Thanks,” Bella said, grateful to have what she’d always wanted.

Freedom to do whatever she wanted with her time. Freedom to live where she was most content. Freedom to spend money on a fabulous vacation without guilt.

So, with all that freedom to revel in, why did she feel as if something was missing?

* * *

In the quiet Upper East Side apartment, Blake thanked his doorman and hung up the phone, his spirits lightening. Once he put Drew to bed, his mood always dipped. In the days before his son’s arrival, he’d discovered just how much he hated being alone. Most nights Vicky had been at the theater preparing for her off-Broadway debut. The part had been small, but she’d been thrilled. Blake had indulged her, knowing his wife needed a diversion. Waiting to become parents had been hard on both of them.

Or so he’d thought.

It was his nature to be focused and driven. Setting goals and achieving them had made him wildly successful in his business. He’d applied the same principles to his personal life: first finding the perfect woman to marry, and then starting a family with her.

He’d taken Vicky at her word when she told him she wanted children someday. Two months after their divorce was final, he wasn’t sure if she’d really wanted to be a mother before being an actress came along and got in the way, or if she’d told him what he wanted to hear so that he’d marry her.

Either way, the results were the same. He and Drew were alone—the same way Blake and his father had been in the ten years following his mother’s return to Paris—and Blake had no intention of letting his son grow up without a mother who loved him.

The doorbell chimed, startling Blake out of his reverie. He glanced at his watch as he headed for the front door. Ten-thirty was late for his sister to be out. But when he opened the door, he saw it wasn’t Jeanne.

Rocking her weight from one black stiletto sandal to another, Bella looked like a kid caught midprank. But she wasn’t a kid. Nor was she the guileless Iowa farm girl she’d been last summer. In the nine months since he’d last seen her, New York City had transformed her into a sophisticated woman who looked at ease in a one-shoulder black minidress that showed off miles of toned leg and bared slender arms adorned with eight inches’ worth of jangling bracelets.

Her inability to meet his gaze gave him hope that the woman he’d befriended wasn’t gone, only hiding beneath her expensive wardrobe. She’d done something with brown eye shadow to make her large, pale blue eyes dominate her face. Not even the bright red she’d applied to her lips could eclipse their haunting beauty. But the stark color did emphasize her mouth’s downward cant. The urge to smear her perfect lipstick with hot, demanding kisses demonstrated that his reaction to her this afternoon hadn’t been a fluke.

Damn this sudden attraction.

He didn’t want to be distracted from his important mission by a fleeting, if forceful, craving to take her to bed. He had to keep the focus on Bella and Drew’s relationship. She needed to become so attached to Drew that she couldn’t imagine not being a part of his life. That would be jeopardized if Blake got physically involved with her.

He stepped back. The move wasn’t an invitation for her to enter, but a retreat from the way she affected him.

“Come in,” he offered, covering his lapse of control.

“I can’t stay long. I’m meeting friends.” She glanced around as she took three steps into the foyer and stopped.

Blake shut the door, trapping them together in the foyer’s dimness. Intimacy crowded them as the silence lengthened.

A year ago they’d been friends. He’d thought her one of the kindest, warmest people he’d ever met. She was everything he imagined the perfect mother to be. Gentle, but resolute. A natural caretaker with a loving heart. Dedicated to her family.

His heartbeat quickened as images of her in the apartment rushed through his mind. The evening she came over for dinner to celebrate her agreeing to act as their surrogate. The afternoon she’d perched on the edge of a chair in the living room while they awaited the results of her pregnancy test. Her, cranky and uncomfortable the morning before she gave birth, four days past her due date and annoyed with him for being so positive despite the extended wait.

Thinking about that day made his heart clench. Twenty-four hours later, she’d exited his son’s life without a backward glance. “What brings you by?”

“I came to tell you my decision.”

“You could have called.” He softened his tone to take the edge off the words. A hint of anxiety tightened his muscles. Having her company in the Hamptons this summer was instrumental to his plans. Unfortunately, at the moment he wasn’t thinking as a father concerned about his motherless child, but as a man who knew how to appreciate a beautiful woman.

“I should have.” She gnawed on her lower lip. “But something has come up and I was wondering if I could borrow three thousand against my salary before we leave New York.”

Any elation he might have felt at her decision was tempered by her request. He’d hoped that meeting Drew would have made his offer irresistible, but here she was thinking only of the money. “I think that can be done.”

He tightened his jaw against the urge to ask why she needed the money. He’d paid her thirty thousand dollars to act as Drew’s surrogate. Had she gone through all that money already? If that was why she’d agreed to be his nanny for a couple months, getting her maternal instinct to kick in might be more of a challenge that it was worth.

“Thank you.” She sounded very relieved.

He paused, considering her. “Don’t you want to know how much I’m going to pay you?”

“I know you’ll be fair.”

“Ten thousand.”

Her eyes widened. “Very fair.”

“Never fear, you’ll earn it.”

As if to punctuate his statement, a wail came from his study, where Blake had left the baby monitor.

Her gaze reached beyond him, delving into the apartment. “Is Drew still up?”

“No. I put him down an hour ago.”

That caught her attention. “You put him down?”

“I am his father.”

“Of course you are.”

“You didn’t expect me to take care of my own son?”

“It’s not that.”

“Then what?”

A line appeared between her delicately arched eyebrows. “I guess I never pictured you doing anything so domestic.”

“You don’t think I’m domesticated?”

That made her lips soften and the edges curve up. “Not really.”

He wasn’t sure what to make of her smile or the way such a minute shifting of facial muscles made his gut twist. “I assure you, I’m quite tame.”

“Then things have changed a lot since Drew was born.”

“And it’s those changes that brought us to where we are right now.”

“You mean being a single dad.”

“Partially.” He noted her quicksilver frown and guessed he’d sparked her curiosity. Before she could question him further, he said, “I’m planning to head to the beach house on Saturday. Can you be ready?”

“Sure. All I need to pack are some shorts and tops.”

“And a bathing suit. Drew loves the water.”

“Since your current nanny is out of commission, do you want me to stop by tomorrow and help Mrs. Gordon pack for Drew?”

Blake wasn’t surprised by her offer. He’d noticed that Bella often went that extra mile when it came to helping people out. “I’m sure she’d appreciate that.”

“Tell her I’ll be by around ten.”

She was turning to go when Blake spoke. “Want to help me check on him?”

The impulsive request caught both of them by surprise.

Bella gestured over her shoulder. “If I’m late my friends will worry.”

“I understand.” But he didn’t move from the foyer, despite his son’s continued distress. “Text them. Tell them where you are.”

His reluctance to let her go wasn’t logical or sensible. Until he’d gone to her school today, he hadn’t realized just how much he’d missed her company. The way her eyes danced with mischief. How easily she made him smile.

He’d spent the past nine months being angry with her; it had blocked out all the good memories. Now, thinking back on how well they’d gotten along and confronted with his startling sexual attraction, Blake was forced to face that his plan was not going to be as straightforward as he’d originally thought.

“They’re waiting for me.” She sidled toward the door, but her attention remained on the source of the unhappy sounds deeper in the apartment. “You’d better go see what’s wrong.”

And she was out the door before his emotional chaos sorted itself out. He headed to his son’s room, contemplating the changes in Bella.

The city had hardened her. Her warmth was no longer as accessible as it once had been. Of course, their final conversation right after Drew’s birth hadn’t been in any way congenial. He’d been harsh, caught off guard by her insistence that she wanted no contact with Drew.

He still didn’t fully believe her explanation. The decision had been such an about-face from everything he believed he knew about her. Well, he would have two uninterrupted months to get to the bottom of her abrupt turnaround.

And before those months were up, he expected to excavate all her secrets.

Four

Little about Blake’s East Hampton home had changed since she’d been here last summer. Painted a soothing pearl gray, trimmed in white, it was expansive and elegant on the outside, with dormer windows that overlooked the sprawling front lawn and gardens. Now Bella stood in the middle of the elegant entry drinking in the vast open floor plan before her attention was drawn to the expensive white furniture.

Everything about the house inspired awe. Including the owner.

Blake stood before the two-story windows at the back of the house, staring toward the beach. Bella couldn’t see past his broad shoulders, clad in a pale blue oxford button-down, to see the pool and glittering ocean beyond. Behind him, a large portrait of his ex-wife stared at him from above the fireplace.

Casting about, Bella noticed several other photos of the stunningly beautiful Victoria Ford, alone and smiling blissfully from the circle of Blake’s arms. Given how dismissive he’d been of his ex-wife and her disregard for her son, she was surprised so many mementos had been permitted to remain.

“I’ll have Mrs. Farnes remove those,” Blake said, noticing what had captured her interest. “Damn,” he muttered. “There’s probably more in the master bedroom.” Blake crossed the room with his long, hungry stride and plucked Drew from her arms, tossing the infant into the air. The boy’s delighted cries drowned out the thump of Bella’s heart as she watched father and son. “And while we’re at it, we’ll have Mrs. Farnes ship the pictures to Victoria in New York.”

Tearing her gaze from Blake’s relaxed face, Bella strode into the living room and took stock of all the potential trouble the nine-month-old boy could get into if she took her eyes off him for a second. “The house could use some baby proofing.”

An unhappy wail followed her words. Bella glanced over her shoulder at the truculent child. Drew wanted to be put down. The forty-five-minute helicopter ride from the East Thirty-Fourth Street heliport hadn’t been particularly restful for Bella, but Drew had taken full advantage of the rocking motion and napped. This meant he was full of energy and ready to go.

“Tell Mrs. Farnes what you need done,” Blake said, giving in to Drew’s demands to be put down.

The baby crawled to the couch and stood up. He required very little help to stay standing. She’d already observed how confidently he walked as long as he had something to hold on to. In no time at all, he’d be walking on his own. Then running. Bella sighed.

“Hello?” a female voice called from the entry. “Anybody home?”

While Blake headed to the front door to greet his stepsister, Drew began working his way along the couch. Bella wished Blake had mentioned that Jeanne would be staying with them this weekend. She would have appreciated the opportunity to prepare herself for the other woman’s chilly dislike.

Bella raced forward and caught Drew’s hand before it snagged a heavy crystal bowl on the end table.

“Where’s my darling nephew?” Jeanne called, sweeping into the living room with great style. She wore a melon-hued linen dress that drew attention to her perfect complexion and played up the reddish highlights in her dark brown hair. A diamond tennis bracelet glittered at her wrist as she descended on her nephew, hands outstretched.

Bella backed away from Drew as his aunt reached him. Jeanne had a knack for making Bella feel like an employee—necessary when the socialite needed something, forgotten otherwise.

“You are going to love it in the Hamptons,” she crooned to Drew, snuggling him close despite his incoherent protests. “We are going to have so much fun this summer.”

Dismayed to hear that Jeanne would be around so much, Bella glanced in Blake’s direction and discovered he was directing the man who’d picked them up at the East Hampton airport on where to put their luggage. The caretaker—Blake had introduced him as Woody—had already brought in several bags belonging to Drew and Blake and had fetched her single suitcase. Alarm stirred as he headed upstairs with it.

“Wait,” Bella called after him. “That’s mine. It belongs in the pool house.”

Blake stopped her. “You’ll be staying in the house. I thought it best if you slept across the hall from Drew.”

She’d expected Blake would assign her the same accommodations as last summer and was distressed by the idea that she would be sleeping a short distance from him. “Why?” she blurted out.

“He’s been waking up in the middle of the night lately. I’ve been having a hard time getting him back to sleep. I thought you’d have better luck.”

“Oh, sure,” she said, failing to keep the dismay out of her voice.

“Problem?”

She couldn’t help but feel as if the walls were closing in on her. This was how it began with her family, too. She’d agree to a simple request to adjust a hemline and the next thing she knew she was sewing a brand-new dress.

“You did mention that I could have my evenings off.”

“Is it your plan to be out all night?” Blake glowered at her.

She steeled herself against a sudden thrill, reminding herself that his concern about her going out—and staying out—was because he expected her to be at Drew’s beck and call. Not because he wanted her company himself.

“Of course not.” She’d much rather spend her nights with Blake and Drew, but he couldn’t know that. He’d start wondering why. “It’s just that I was hoping to have a little fun this summer and I really enjoyed the pool house.” She’d appreciated the privacy. If not the solitude.

“And I’d like you to be close by.”

“Blake, let the girl stay in the pool house if that’s what she wants,” Jeanne broke in, her exasperation plain. “I really don’t see why she’s here at all. I’m perfectly capable of watching Drew this summer.”

Jeanne’s negative attitude toward her had never been this overt and Bella wondered what she’d done to turn the woman against her.

Blake’s stepsister gave up the battle with the squirmy Drew and set him down on the foyer’s cool marble. Immediately he began crawling toward the open door. Bella chased after him, deciding it would be easier to wear out the adventurous infant than to try to contain him. Glad to escape the stare-down between siblings, Bella scooped up Drew and marched him outside.

“You will be far too busy lunching with friends and shopping to be a full-time babysitter,” Blake countered, his voice calm but steely. “Bella will give him her full attention.”

To keep him out of trouble, she’d have to. Bella steered Drew away from roses that flanked the sidewalk and aimed for the large expanse of smooth, green lawn. As soon as she’d gauged Drew was a safe distance from the flowerbeds that enclosed the mansion in graceful, bright waves, she plopped onto the grass with a heavy sigh and began tickling Drew’s round belly.

His hearty giggles made her smile. She lost herself in his darling grin and ran her fingers through his soft hair. Sighing, she snuggled him close and imprinted his scent in her memories. He endured it all with good humor and took his own turn investigating her nose and mouth with his chubby fingers.

The late-afternoon sunlight cast long shadows across the lawn and Bella knew she couldn’t hide out here with Drew much longer. The wind coming off the ocean was growing cooler by the minute. She was psyching herself up to return to the house when she heard the slam of a car door and an engine starting.

Glancing over her shoulder, she spied Jeanne’s silver Lexus heading away from the house and Blake striding across the lawn toward them. Her pulse jerked erratically at his somber expression and she wondered if he was going to send her back to the city.

“Where’s Jeanne going?” she asked, startled when he sat beside her.

Hoisting Drew onto his lap, Blake stared after his sister. “She’s heading home.”

“Back to New York?” It distressed Bella to think she’d come between the siblings.

“She and Peter have a rental just down the beach.”

“Then she’s not staying here?” She couldn’t stop relief from overwhelming her voice.

“No.” Blake’s eyebrow lifted. “I take it you’re glad.”

Bella plucked at the lawn. “Your sister doesn’t like me.”

“It’s not that she doesn’t like you,” he explained, weariness twisting his mouth into an unhappy line.

“You could have fooled me.”

“She doesn’t want us spending the summer together.” Blake was watching Drew crawl toward a butterfly that had flitted across his path and spoke almost absently.

“Why not?”

“She thinks you have feelings for me.”

Bella couldn’t have been more shocked. “What?” she sputtered, sounding anything but amused or incredulous. She sounded guilty. “That’s crazy.”

Blake’s gaze sharpened as it swung in her direction. “I don’t know. She was pretty convinced. It was something about the way you looked at me last year.”

Sucking in a breath, intending further protest, Bella was silenced by the heat in his eyes. The chilly afternoon suddenly seemed like a midsummer scorcher.

“She’s making that up.” Bella quivered. “I’ve never thought of you as anything more than a friend. You were married.”

“I’m not married anymore.” His fingers grazed her cheek and slipped beneath her hair.

Her nape tingled as he stroked her skin.

“Sure. But that doesn’t mean anything has changed.”

“Hasn’t it?”

Transfixed by the intent glowing in the blue-gray depths of his eyes, she forgot to breathe. The desire that had haunted her for months exploded in her midsection. Reason melted like spring snow on a sunny day.

She wanted him. Badly.

“Tell me you’ve never imagined me kissing you,” Blake demanded, cupping the back of her head and urging her forward. He frowned as the distance between them narrowed.

This could not be happening. If he came any closer, she was going to make a huge fool out of herself.

“I’ve never.”

His lips stopped a mere whisper from hers. “Say it again and make me believe it.”

“I’ve—”

He didn’t let her finish.

* * *

Blake meant the kiss to put an end to his craving for her. A quick taste and she’d be out of his system.

That’s the way it was supposed to work. He didn’t expect her soft moan to scatter all rational thought. Or the way her lips parted beneath his to rob him of control. He’d intended to keep the upper hand, but when her fingers tunneled into his hair and tightened almost painfully, he lost the willpower to set her free.

He rubbed his mouth back and forth against hers, felt her body soften. Almost from the first, she surrendered herself completely to the moment. To him. Despite her earlier protests, she offered herself without reservation.

Deepening the pressure on her mouth, he let his tongue slip past her even, white teeth. He thrust into the warm wetness of her mouth, licking at all the sweetness awaiting him. Her ardent reception evoked another moan. This one his.

In a flash he knew this was no experiment. It wasn’t going to end easily with him lifting his lips from hers. Stopping the kiss was going to take effort. Way more than it should.

Heat poured through him. He was consumed by desire. Intense. Inappropriate toward the woman who was his son’s nanny.

Right and wrong. Simple and complicated.

This had been a mistake. But one he wasn’t going to quit making until it was certain to haunt him for the rest of the summer. Maybe beyond.

Drew’s sharp cry sliced through the air, severing their kiss. Bella jerked away and scrambled to her feet faster than Drew could draw breath for a second shriek. Cursing the way his heart was pounding, Blake followed her across the lawn to where his son sat on the grass, his features crumpled in torment.

Recognizing that it wasn’t a regular old temper tantrum, Bella had fallen to her knees beside Drew. Her hands skimmed over his face and arms, searching for the damage. Blake joined them just as she found the red spot on the back of his hand.

“I think he was stung by something.” She scooped the child into her arms and held him close. “You poor baby.”

“Are you sure he was stung?”

Bella shot him a stern look. “I grew up on a farm. I know what a sting looks like.” She cupped Drew’s cheek and surveyed him. “Is there any history of allergic reactions to bees or wasps in your family?”

“No.” He helped her stand, hating the feeling of helplessness that always came over him when Drew cried. “Do you know what to look for if he has a reaction?”

“Difficulty breathing. Severe swelling.”

“Someone in your family is allergic?” he quizzed, concern growing as he imagined Drew being afflicted by those symptoms.

She shook her head. “No, but I had a student who carried an EpiPen in case she got stung, which of course she did. About a week into my first year as a teacher. Luckily our classroom was close to the playground so we could get the epinephrine into her before her throat swelled shut.”

As they reached the house, they met up with Mrs. Farnes at the front door. She looked from Drew to Bella.

“What’s happened?”

“He’s been stung,” Bella answered, her pace slowing as she entered the house.

“Wasp or bee?” Mrs. Farnes quizzed, catching Drew’s flailing hand so she could peer at the red spot. “Looks like it’s swelling some.”

“I didn’t see a stinger, so I’m assuming it was a wasp.” Bella shifted Drew higher on her hip. “Do you think you could pour some vinegar in a bowl?”

“Of course.” Mrs. Farnes raced back to the kitchen.

Bella followed, wiping tears from Drew’s cheeks as she went.

“Vinegar?” Blake demanded, suspicious.

“It’s what we always used on the farm. The acid neutralizes the venom.”

“What about a doctor?”

She kissed Drew on the temple and snuggled him close. “He’s not showing any signs of a reaction. I think he’ll be just fine once his hand stops hurting.”

As difficult as it was to entrust his son’s welfare to another person, Blake knew that if he interfered, he would disrupt the attachment sparking between Bella and Drew. And this was exactly the sort of situation where Bella shone. Taking care of someone who needed her was as natural as breathing for her. She just needed to stop denying who she was.

Drew’s sobs had devolved into ragged inhalations that shook his whole body, followed by a keening cry that had Bella blinking back tears of her own. Blake watched them. Was this the moment Bella transformed into a concerned parent, or was she merely distraught because Drew was so upset?