The Mills & Boon Sparkling Christmas Collection

Chapter Ten

It was Friday morning and Eva was trying desperately to hold herself together, determined not to embarrass Jamie. Knowing she could quite easily dissolve into a pool of tears, she dug her nails into her palms, hardly believing her son was going away without her.

Last night she and Jamie had packed his bag. Eva had ironed name tags onto his jumpers, trousers, and towels and then stuffed them into his rucksack with the hundred pairs of socks he’d been told to bring. She tried to go along with Jamie’s obvious enthusiasm but seeing him so excited reminded Eva so much of Paul.

She had blocked the image of Paul getting ready to go off skiing, the glint in his eye he used to get at the thought of the adrenaline rush to come, which used to terrify her. This was different she told herself, taking a deep breath and speaking in the calmest voice she could find. ‘Listen carefully to all the instructions, okay? And do exactly what you’re told.’ Eva looked Jamie in the eye, willing him to keep safe.

‘Yeah all right, Mum. We’ve been over this like ten times,’ he said with a sigh.

Sometimes Eva looked at her son and was amazed at how grown up and tall he was becoming but today all she could see was her little boy. The boy she had cherished since the moment he was born and who was now standing with his rucksack attached to his back ready to leave her. Heather came over and gave her arm a reassuring squeeze.

‘You know, worrying is an occupational hazard but you do tend to take it to extremes. He will be all right, I promise.’ She smiled.

‘I know,’ Eva sighed wishing she could be so relaxed. The bus pulled up outside the football club and the babble of voices grew louder as the children who had been standing in groups with parents now started to make their way towards the bus. A coach with a clipboard ticked their names off. Hugs and final kisses were given. Eva quickly wrapped her arms around Jamie.

‘Have an amazing time. I love you!’ Eva waved as the bus trundled out of sight, feeling as if her whole world was disappearing.

‘I had a feeling you might need one of these,’ Heather said handing her a tissue.

‘Thanks,’ Eva sniffed with a weak smile and proceeded to blow her nose.

But there the sympathy ended. Heather was not giving her chance to wallow. She had already informed Eva her that she was taking charge after the boys left and, knowing this was the night of the Professor’s ceilidh had organized some pampering.

‘Honestly, Heather, you don’t have to do this,’ Eva pleaded. Going home and burying herself under a blanket for the next forty-eight hours suddenly sounded very appealing. Heather treated her to a withering look.

‘When did you last do anything just for yourself?’

‘I, um –’

‘Exactly. You deserve a day with some pampering. What else would you do now? You’d go home and just obsess about Jamie staying safe.’

Unable to deny it, Eva sighed. ‘But I don’t want to make a big deal about tonight. It’s just a casual invitation.’

‘Well then, you’re going to look casually sexy.’

Eva knew there was no point in protesting, not when Heather had that sparkle in her eye – she was a woman on a mission and there was no stopping her. She’d have to try and go with it even though her mind and body were sending mixed signals about what she wanted from tonight.

Eva hadn’t expected Ben to ask her to this ceilidh and wasn’t sure what, if anything, to read into it. A favour he had called it. He saw her as a friend and you asked a friend to do you a favour. But the night of the storm kept replaying in her mind. During their conversation she had felt a real connection and then just before the lights turned back on she had felt an intensity – almost a physical heat – between them. Even thinking of it now sent tingles through her body, as if parts of her that had been frozen for years were beginning to thaw and on a massive scale.

Heather was talking to herself, looking at her watch. ‘We have time for a spray tan if you want? Don’t suppose you’ve ever had one before?’

‘No and I don’t want one today, thank you.’

Heather peered at her, narrowing her eyes. ‘I suppose you can get away with it. You’re lucky to have such lovely colouring. In that case we’ll have a quick coffee before your facial. Then the hairdresser’s and a bit of shopping.’

‘But I don’t need –’ Eva’s voice trailed off as Heather put up her hand.

‘It’s all booked now so it’s too late.’

Two hours later Eva lay with her head back in a head-massage-induced trance. The heavenly head treatment came complimentary with her haircut and it was exquisite. It was only thoughts of the evening ahead, which kept popping into her head, that prevented her from becoming totally comatose.

Once Heather was happy everything on her list had been attended to, they drove back to Eva’s house. While Heather sorted through various shopping bags, Eva couldn’t resist a small smile at her reflection in the mirror. She’d almost forgotten the power of a good cut and blow-dry.

‘I’m not sure what you were planning on wearing, but I have something to show you before you decide,’ Heather said while Eva was busy turning her head from side to side admiring the way her hair bounced over her shoulders. She should probably be ashamed how bedraggled it had become but her appearance simply hadn’t been much of a priority recently.

Heather was now pulling a slip of dark blue material from a bag and carefully unfolding it to reveal a beautiful dress. ‘Wow, that’s lovely,’ Eva exclaimed.

‘I’m glad you like it because it’s for you to wear tonight.’

‘I can’t take this!’

‘Of course you can. I bought it and never wore it. I’m two pregnancies away from ever fitting into that dress. Try it on at least.’

‘All right then, just for you,’ Eva conceded giving her friend a fond look.

Eva changed clothes, gently pulling the dress over her head. It had been so long since she’d worn anything pretty she almost didn’t recognize her own reflection. The dress had a mesh neckline with embroidered detailing and a fitted bodice that flared out at the hips, stopping just before her knees.

‘Oh, that’s gorgeous. It’ll be perfect for spinning round the dance floor and showing off your legs. It’s fun and flirty but retains a certain elegance.’ Heather’s head bobbed in approval.

‘Are you sure?’ Eva asked, seeking reassurance.

‘It’s perfect. Just think of me as your fairy godmother.’

Eva shot her a comical look and curtsied. She had to confess to feeling great in it.

‘I’ve got to say, it’s good to see you in something so feminine – you look lovely.’

‘Not exactly my dungarees is it?’ Eva grinned at Heather.

‘As hot as they are, this is even hotter, trust me.’

‘What’s that for?’ Eva asked as Heather now handed her a glass filled with sparkling wine.

‘Liquid courage.’

‘Thanks,’ she replied as they clinked glasses. ‘But I won’t need it. Nothing is going to happen.’

‘Oh, I wish it was me going out,’ Heather sighed wistfully. ‘Talking to people, making eye contact, a little flirting, lingering looks … Oh I forgot the excitement of a date.’

‘It’s not a date! And anyway, you have Douglas. You wouldn’t change anything would you?’ Eva looked at her friend thinking how the spark between Heather and Douglas was still obvious.

‘No of course I wouldn’t. It’s just that feeling at the beginning. Butterflies in your stomach, a racing heart, counting the minutes until you see him again …’

‘Uh-huh,’ Eva muttered, all those things sounding disturbingly familiar.

‘It’s really quite magical,’ Heather reminisced happily, drinking more wine.

‘Did you always know Douglas was the one?’

‘Suppose I did. We met in a nightclub, fancied each other and that was it really – sounds quite old-fashioned now.’

‘Apparently one in five relationships now start online.’

‘Really? How’d you know that?’

Feeling caught out, Eva stuttered, ‘I, er was just looking, you know … at dating sites.’

Heather’s head swivelled around. ‘Why were you doing that?’

Eva’s shoulders slumped. ‘All right, I admit it. I have been having thoughts … feelings if you will, about Ben.’

‘I knew it! Oh this is so exciting.’

‘I’m so out of the whole dating thing, I only wanted to know what kind of questions they asked. See if I could work out if we were compatible, if our personalities matched.’

‘So what questions did they ask?’ Heather sounded interested.

‘Well, you had to choose words to describe yourself – like shy, affectionate, outgoing, intelligent. Then tick things you like doing – cinema, theatre, reading, shopping, dining, and so on.’

‘And?’

‘From the little I know about him, I’d say we have nothing in common.’

Heather chuckled, shaking her head. ‘Nonsense – you two are made for each other, I can just tell.’

‘How much of that wine have you had? Think about it. He reads science journals; I read trashy magazines. He’s probably a member of Mensa and I have trouble finishing the easy crossword.’

‘I wouldn’t pay too much attention to all that stuff. It’s all about the chemistry,’ Heather professed selecting various jars and tubes, which she had laid out on the table. ‘It’s time to do your make-up.’

‘All right but I don’t want to wear too much,’ Eva protested taking the foundation from Heather. She applied some eye shadow, a little eye liner, mascara, and finished with a touch of pink lipstick. ‘There. Will I do?’ she turned to ask Heather.

‘My work here is done.’ Heather grinned.

Later, when they discovered Heather had managed to drink almost the whole bottle of wine by herself, Douglas was called upon to take her home. After they’d gone, Eva was left on her own waiting for Ben to arrive, feeling madly nervous. She kept checking her phone for no reason.

She almost jumped out of her skin when the doorbell sounded and she made her way to the door on wobbly legs. She almost gasped at how breathtakingly handsome Ben looked. His hair had been neatly swept back and he wore a pale blue shirt under a smart jacket with black jeans. She saw his eyes skim over her before he smiled.

‘Wow,’ he said in a low voice. ‘You look lovely.’

‘Thanks,’ she replied, snatching her coat and bag and trying to breathe normally. She closed the front door behind her, reminding herself this wasn’t a date even though it was the closest she’d come to one in a very long time. The evening was cool but pleasant for walking and they strolled a short distance before coming to a little pub on the corner. Its windows glowed invitingly with light and they seemed to have the same idea.

‘Do you fancy a quick drink?’

‘Just what I was thinking.’ Eva smiled.

The pub was busy with the sound of lively chat and had an end-of-week feel to it. Eva made her way to a small table she had spotted in the corner and took a seat while Ben went to the bar. Looking round Eva noticed how relaxed everyone seemed but she felt distinctly jittery. It wasn’t just being out on a Friday night but being with a man, almost as if she was in someone else’s body.

Eva certainly wasn’t in the habit of eyeing up men in pubs, but as her eyes settled on Ben standing at the bar ordering their drinks she realized that’s exactly what she doing now. It wasn’t just that he was tall and handsome – that much was obvious. There was something else about him, a quality that drew her to him and made her conscious of his every move. Eva sat up with a jolt as it dawned on her she was lusting after Ben. She glanced to a group of men standing at the bar. All perfectly healthy-looking male specimens … nope, nothing. Her gaze slid back to Ben and there it was again, her body pulsing with desire.

Feeling a little light-headed she grabbed the drink when Ben placed it in front of her and gulped a mouthful too fast. Ben looked at her with concern as she spluttered.

‘You all right?’

‘Fine,’ she replied with a little cough.

‘So did Jamie set off this morning?’ Ben asked raising his beer to his mouth.

Eva nodded. ‘The boys weren’t allowed to take mobile phones – part of the ethos of the trip. But the group leader sent a text letting us know they’d arrived safely and were settling in.’

‘And how are you coping?’

‘Okay so far – I’m trying not to think about it too much, keeping my mind on other things.’ In fact, she should probably be thanking Ben for the first-class job he was doing distracting her. The sound of sudden loud laughter made their heads turn to a rowdy group sitting near them.

‘So, is this place a regular of yours?’ Ben asked with a small smile.

‘Hardly.’ Eva chuckled thinking of her social life. ‘I don’t go out that much. I actually consider parents’ evening at Jamie’s school a major event in my social diary.’

Ben gave a little laugh and Eva adored the way his eyes crinkled at the edges.

‘My friend Heather likes to drag me to various places now and again. She thinks I should go out more, try and meet someone …’ Eva blushed, not sure why she had said that.

‘And have you – ever gone out and met someone?’

‘Nope.’ She paused, aware she was about to admit something she’d never said out loud before. ‘I suppose I haven’t wanted to risk being hurt.’ She lifted her eyes to find Ben watching her, with an expression she couldn’t read.

‘Any man who hurt you would have to be an idiot,’ he said simply.

Eva picked up her glass, not sure how to respond although her insides were close to melting. She let out an awkward little laugh, trying to sound normal.

‘What about you? This must be quite different after the bright lights of London.’

He looked around. ‘Yeah, this is very different but nice. I like it.’

‘Did you go out much – socializing?’

He rubbed a hand across his jaw. ‘Working in finance in the city you kind of had to. It was almost part of the culture. The company where I worked, most of us were members of a private club. Plush and pricey – not somewhere I ever felt comfortable but after finishing a long manic day it was difficult just to go home and switch off. It was easier to go and unwind, talk shop.’ He shook his head at the memory. ‘That was where I met Samantha.’

‘Did she work for the same company as you?’

‘No, she worked in IT for another company. We kept meeting there with the same crowd after work and eventually just wound up together.’

‘Doesn’t sound very romantic.’

‘Romantic?’ The observation seemed to surprise him and he rubbed a hand around his neck before looking at her. ‘No, I don’t suppose it was. What you had with Paul, was that romantic?’

‘More exciting than romantic I think, at least at the beginning.’ Losing Paul had left her shocked, scared, and even angry at times but over the years Eva had come to terms with what had happened between them. She had difficulty imagining them as a couple today. ‘When I think of him now, it’s as someone I used to love but more as a friend. Obviously we had Jamie but in all honesty, I’m not sure we would have stayed together. He wasn’t my grand passion.’

She sipped her drink, slightly shocked to hear herself admit that out loud but for some reason felt better for having said it. ‘What about you?’ she continued. ‘You don’t miss London and – everything?’

She watched Ben lift his glass to his mouth and slowly put it back down, his eyes never leaving hers.

‘Not a single bit of it.’ The air seemed to hang thickly between them and Eva felt her cheeks grow hot. She straightened in her seat, casually flicking her hair over her shoulders in a bid to appear normal, wondering if Ben was feeling it too.

‘So from private clubs to ceilidhs … this is going to be quite a change for you. Have you ever even been to a ceilidh before?’ she asked lightly.

‘Once at university and that was a long time ago so I’d better warn you now, I won’t have clue how to do any of the dances. I take it you’ve been to a few before?’

‘Loads. We were taught all the dances at school so they kind of stay with you for life after that. Don’t worry, I’ll keep you right.’

‘I’ll hold you to that. Here’s to a good night.’ They brought their glasses together.

***

Ben was having trouble keeping his eyes off Eva. He’d been pretty much mesmerized by her since the moment he’d seen her tonight. After their drink in the pub, they had made the short walk to the university. They had passed through the leafy quadrangle and entered the grand hall, which was ablaze with light and colour. The panelled walls were lined with saltire flags and hundreds of fairy lights trailed along the stained-glass windows.

The ceilidh was already in full swing and Ben had led the way to one of the tables encircling the dance floor where he spotted some colleagues. After a few introductions they had soon found themselves joining in, Ben discovering it was impossible not to be swept away by the sheer energy of the dancing. He was totally bewildered at first as he tried to keep up, finding it chaotic until he started to see the patterns and formations emerging for each dance.

Eva had helped him, trying to guide him through the steps but quite often she’d ended up in fits of giggles. She looked beautiful as she had thrown her head back laughing at his attempts. And among the noise and movement all Ben could see was Eva, his eyes drawn to her like a magnet. Watching her body move and the way her dress clung to her curves was driving him to distraction.

The Canadian barn dance had just finished and the band announced a break so people returned to their tables, grateful for a seat and refreshments. Now Eva was sitting beside him at their table, slightly breathless and her cheeks flushed.

‘Are you having fun?’ she asked with a grin.

He nodded. ‘I am, but I’m not sure I’m a worthy partner.’

‘You’re doing all right for an Englishman,’ she teased.

‘You seem to be enjoying yourself?’ he asked, loving that she looked so happy and relaxed.

‘I am.’ She beamed back at him. ‘I forgot what good fun a ceilidh is.’

Out the corner of his eye Ben had seen Professor Drummond making his way round the tables and saw him now approach their table. Ben smiled at how distinguished and dazzling he looked in full highland regalia.

‘Ben! Good to see you.’ He shook hands with Ben, his eyes already on Eva. ‘And who is this lovely young lady?’

‘Professor, this is Eva. Eva, this is Professor Drummond.’

In a theatrical gesture the Professor bent down to kiss her hand. ‘Lovely to meet you, Eva. Don’t you two make quite the handsome couple,’ he said with a mischievous glint in his eye. Knowing the Professor well, Ben threw him a warning smile.

‘Nice to meet you,’ Eva replied.

‘Did you know Ben was my best ever student? He left me for a while but I always knew he’d come back.’ The Professor patted Ben on the back, looking at him affectionately. ‘Now, I have to go and make speeches and thank people for their donations.’ He clasped Ben’s hand in two of his, shaking it. ‘You especially, Ben.’

He turned his attention back to Eva, giving her a wink. ‘He’s a wee bittie special but I think you might know that already.’

As the Professor wandered off to the next table Kat suddenly appeared, clinging on to Dan, one of the research assistants who fortunately didn’t look too unhappy about it.

‘Hi, Ben,’ she cooed.

Sensing Eva bristle, Ben instinctively rested his hand on her waist, pulling her towards him. ‘Eva, these are my colleagues: Kat and Dan.’

Kat looked Eva up and down, her eyes narrowing as she tried to place her. As recognition dawned, an unpleasant sneer crept onto her face. ‘Oh, you’re the decorator, aren’t you?’

Ben didn’t like her condescending tone and opened his mouth to speak but Eva squeezed his hand, shooting Kat a charming smile.

‘That’s right. Do let me know if you have any painting or decorating you need done – my rates are very reasonable and I’m sure Ben would be happy to recommend me.’

Kat stared at her for a moment then gave her a dismissive look, turning her attention to Ben. ‘I haven’t had a dance yet, Ben. Next one’s mine when the band starts up?’

Ben felt his irritation rise again and he suddenly wanted to get out of the hall, wanted Eva to himself. ‘Actually, we were just thinking about leaving.’ He lifted an eyebrow at Eva for confirmation and was relieved to see her nod in agreement.

After a few handshakes and farewells Ben guided Eva out, weaving their way through the throng of bodies and out of the hall. The world fell silent and the evening air was cool after the heat of the hall as they walked back the way they had come earlier.

‘You didn’t mind leaving, did you?’ he checked again with Eva.

‘Not at all. I don’t think my feet could have taken any more anyway. But didn’t you want to hear the speeches?’

‘I can live without them and I don’t think the Professor will mind.’

‘I liked him.’ She smiled. ‘So did you enjoy your first proper ceilidh then?’

‘How could I not? The dancing was fun and the music was great – plus I got to dance with the most beautiful woman there.’ He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. ‘Thank you for coming with me.’

Eva glanced sideways at him from under her lashes, looking adorably shy before replying. ‘Thanks for asking for me – it was great fun.’

Since the night of the storm Ben felt as if something had been unleashed in him. Not just his physical attraction to Eva but an emotional connection to her also. He had held himself back, worried that Eva had been on her own since losing her husband because she still loved him. He had been wary about treading on his memory but knowing Paul hadn’t been the love of her life filled him with hope and excitement.

He could see that she had worked hard to get the life she had. He didn’t want to jeopardize her and Jamie’s stable world and he’d wrestled with his feelings but tonight, it felt like a physical impossibility to ignore those feelings.

Ben kept hold of her hand and their bodies drew closer. The night was clear and Ben automatically looked up. There was a large pale moon and the sky was pinpricked with thousands of twinkling stars. ‘Did you know Scotland was one of the best places in the world to stargaze?’ he asked.

‘Is it something to do with long winter nights?’

‘That’s one of the reasons.’ He smiled. ‘It’s also because Scotland has a low population density so there’s less light pollution, which makes it easier to see.’

Ben stopped walking and slipped his hand around Eva’s waist, pointing with his free hand to a particular point in the sky. ‘Can you see the big dipper?’

Eva looked up, her eyes roaming the darkness before nodding after a few moments.

‘Now, focus in on the point where the handle of the big dipper meets the cup and draw an imaginary line from that point to the last star in the handle of the little dipper across from it.’

‘Ok-kay, think I got it.’

‘That line goes right through Cassiopeia – do you see? Those five bright stars making a W shape?’ He traced the shape with his finger, watching Eva as her eyes scanned the sky until suddenly her face burst into a delighted smile as she recognized the formation.

‘I see it!’

‘That’s Cassiopeia, a constellation in the northern sky.’

‘Wow. Why’s it called Cassiopeia?’

‘Traditionally constellations are named after a mythological figure. Cassiopeia was supposed to be a vain queen who boasted about her unrivalled beauty.’

‘Really?’

Ben gazed at Eva, who didn’t seem to have a shred of vanity or to be aware of just how beautiful she was and it was driving him crazy. She was looking at him now, her green gaze intense and her lips slightly parted. He gently pulled her in towards him and tipped her chin with his finger, moving it towards his face so that their mouths were tantalizingly close.

‘I don’t think you have any idea how beautiful you are.’ He brushed his mouth against hers.

‘I don’t?’ she mumbled, her body moving in closer.

Ben felt consumed by a need for the feel of her and knew it was impossible for him to ignore the rush of desire invading every inch of his body. His finger trailed along her collarbone, up her neck and then around the shape of her lips. Very slowly he cupped her face and looked deep into her eyes, needing to know if she felt the same. She stared back into his eyes and answered his unspoken question by bringing her lips up to meet his again, her hands sliding to the back of his neck.

This time the kiss was long and deep. He heard her murmur his name and as she moved herself closer into him he felt the softness of her body against him and the feeling was so much more than he ever could have imagined.