The Best Kept Secrets...

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Saying he would never again taste her was a hard one, but for her peace of mind and for his own, he would say it. “Yes, tasting.”

“Good. We’re in agreement.”

He wouldn’t exactly say that, but for now he would hold his tongue—that same tongue that enjoyed dueling with hers. “I guess we need to head back.”

“Okay, and I don’t need your help mounting my horse.”

In other words, she didn’t want him to touch her. “You sure?”

“Positive.”

He nodded and then watched her move away from his horse to get on hers. As usual, it was a total turn-on watching her. “I want to thank you, Aidan.”

He took his gaze away from the sight of her legs straddling the horse to look into her face. “Thank me for what?”

“For introducing me to a few things during this visit home.”

For some reason that made him smile. “It was my pleasure.” And he meant every word.

Chapter Seven

“You're still not going home, Jillian?”

Jillian looked up from eating her breakfast to see her roommate, Ivy Rollins. They had met in her sophomore year when Jillian knew she didn’t want to live in the dorm any longer. She had wanted an apartment off campus and someone to share the cost with her. Ivy, who had plans to attend law school, had answered the ad Jillian placed in the campus newspaper. They’d hit it off the first time they’d met and had been the best of friends since. Jillian couldn’t ask for a better roommate.

“I was home last month,” she reminded Ivy.

“Yes, but that was a couple of days for your birthday. Next week is spring break.”

Jillian didn’t want to be reminded. Pam had called yesterday to see if Jillian would be coming home since Nadia had made plans to do so. Paige, who was attending UCLA, had gotten a small part in a play on campus and needed to remain in Los Angeles. Guilt was still riding Jillian over what she and Aidan had done. She hated deceiving her sister about anything. “I explained to Pam that I need to start studying for the MCAT. She understood.”

“I hate leaving you, but—”

“But you will,” Jillian said, smiling. “And that’s fine. I know how homesick you get.” That was an understatement. Ivy’s family lived in Oregon. Her parents, both chefs, owned a huge restaurant there. Her two older brothers were chefs as well and assisted her parents. Ivy had decided on a different profession than her parents and siblings, but she loved going home every chance she got to help out.

“Yes, I will,” Ivy said, returning her smile. “In fact I leave in two days. Sure you’ll be okay?”

“Yes, I’ll be fine. I’ve got enough to keep me busy since I’m sitting for the MCAT in two months. And I need to start working on my essays.”

“It’s a bummer you’ll be doing something other than enjoying yourself next week,” Ivy said.

“It’s okay. Getting into medical school is the most important thing to me right now.”

A few hours later Jillian sat at the computer desk in her bedroom searching the internet. She had tossed around the idea of joining a study group for the MCAT and there appeared to be several. Normally, she preferred studying solo but for some reason she couldn’t concentrate. She pushed away from the computer and leaned back in her chair knowing the reason.

Aidan.

It had been a little over a month since she’d gone home for her birthday, and Aidan had been wrong. She hadn’t woken up in her bed in Wyoming not thinking of him. In fact she thought of him even more. All the time. Thoughts of him had begun interfering with her studies.

She got up and moved to the kitchen to grab a soda from the refrigerator. He should have been out of her system by now, but he wasn’t. Memories of him put her to sleep at night and woke her up in the morning. And then in the wee hours of the night, she recalled in vivid detail his kisses, especially the ones between her legs.

Remembering that particular kiss sent a tingling sensation through her womanly core, which wasn’t good. In fact, nothing about what she was going through was good. Sexual withdrawal. And she hadn’t even had sex with Aidan, but she hadn’t needed sex to get an orgasm. That in itself showed the magnitude of his abilities.

Returning to her bedroom she pushed thoughts of him from her mind. Sitting back down at her desk, she resumed surfing the net. She bet he hadn’t even given her a thought. He probably wasn’t missing any sleep thinking of her, and he had probably woken up his first day back in Boston with some woman in his bed. Why did that thought bother her?

She had been tempted to ask Pam if she’d heard from Aidan, but hadn’t for fear her sister would wonder why Jillian was inquiring about Aidan when she hadn’t before.

Jillian turned around when she heard a knock on her bedroom door. “Come in.”

Ivy walked into the room, smiling. “I know you have a lot to do but you’ve been in here long enough. Come grab a bite to eat at the Wild Duck. My treat.”

Ivy wasn’t playing fair. She knew the Wild Duck was one of Jillian’s favorite eating places. They had the best hamburgers and fries. “You’ve twisted my arm,” she said, pushing away from the desk.

Ivy chuckled. “Yeah. Right.”

Jillian stood, thinking she did need a break. And maybe she could get Aidan off her mind.

* * *

“How are you doing, Dr. Westmoreland?”

Aidan smiled over at the doctor who’d transferred in to the medical school during the weekend that he’d gone home. He really should ask her out. Lynette Bowes was attractive, she had a nice figure, and she seemed friendly enough. At times almost too friendly. She enjoyed flirting with him and she’d gone so far as to make a few bold innuendos, which meant getting her into his bed probably would be easy. So what was he waiting on?

“I’m fine, Dr. Bowes, and how are you?”

She leaned over to hand him a patient’s chart, intentionally brushing her breasts against his arm. “I would be a lot a better if you dropped by my apartment tonight,” she whispered.

Another invite. Why was he stalling? Why wasn’t he on top of his game as usual? And why was he thinking that the intimate caress she’d purposely initiated just now had nothing on the caresses he’d experienced with Jillian?

“Thanks, but I have plans for tonight,” he lied.

“Then maybe another night?”

“I’ll let you know.” He appreciated his cell phone going off at that moment. “I’ll see you later.” He made a quick escape.

Later that night while at home doing nothing but flipping TV channels, he couldn’t help wondering what the hell was wrong with him. Although he’d asked himself that question, he knew the answer without thinking.

Jillian.

He’d assumed once he was back in Boston and waking up in his own bed that he would eradicate her from his mind. Unfortunately, he’d found out that wasn’t the case. He thought about her every free moment, and he even went to bed thinking about her. And the dreams he had of her were double X-rated. His desire for her was so bad that he hadn’t thought twice about wanting anyone else.

And it hadn’t helped matters when he’d called home earlier in the week and Dillon mentioned that Jillian wasn’t coming home for spring break. She told Pam she had registered to take the MCAT and needed the time to study and work on her admissions essays. He applauded her decision to make sacrifices to reach her goal, but he was disappointed she hadn’t reached out to him like he’d suggested. He’d made a pretty high score on the MCAT and could give her some study pointers. He’d even keyed his contact information into her phone.

Yet she hadn’t called to ask him a single question about anything. That could only mean she didn’t want his help and had probably pushed what happened between them to the back of her mind. Good for her, but he didn’t like the fact that she remained in the center of his.

Tossing the remote aside he reached for his cell phone to pull up her number. When her name appeared he put the phone down. They’d had an agreement, so to speak. An understanding. They would put that time in Denver behind them. It had been enjoyable but was something that could not and would not be repeated. No more kissing, touching...or tasting.

Hell, evidently that was easy for her to do, but it was proving to be downright difficult for him. There were nights he woke up wanting her with a passion, hungering to kiss her, touch her and taste her.

The memories of them going riding together, especially that day spent in Bane’s cabin...every moment of that time was etched in Aidan’s mind, making his brain cells overload.

Like now.

When he’d pulled down her jeans, followed by her panties, and had buried his head between her legs and tasted her...the memory made his groin tighten. Need for Jillian clawed at him in a way that made it difficult to breathe.

Aidan stood and began pacing the floor in his apartment, trying to wear down his erection. He paused when an idea entered his mind. He had time he could take off and he might as well do it now. He’d only been to Laramie, Wyoming, a couple of times, and maybe he should visit there again. He would take in the sights and check out a few good restaurants. And there was no reason for him not to drop in on Jillian to see how she was doing while he was there.

No reason at all.

* * *

Three days later, Jillian sat at the kitchen table staring at the huge study guide in front of her. It had to be at least five hundred pages thick and filled with information to prepare her for the MCAT. The recommendation was that students take three months to study, but since she was enrolled in only one class this semester she figured she would have more time to cram and could get it done in two months. That meant she needed to stay focused. No exceptions. And she meant none.

 

But her mind was not in agreement, especially when she could lick her lips and imagine Aidan doing that very same thing. And why—after one month, nine days and twenty minutes—could she still do that? Why hadn’t she been able to forget about his kisses and move on? Especially now when she needed to focus.

The apartment was empty and felt lonely without Ivy. It was quiet and just what she needed to get some serious studying done. She had eaten a nice breakfast and had taken a walk outside to get her brain and body stimulated. But now her mind wanted to remember another type of stimulation. One that even now sent tingles through her lower stomach.

She was about to take a sip of her coffee when the doorbell sounded. She frowned. Most of her neighbors were college students like her, and the majority of them had gone home for spring break. She’d noticed how vacant the parking lot had looked while out walking earlier.

Getting up from the kitchen table she moved toward the front door. She glanced through her peephole and her breath caught. Standing on the other side of her door was the one man she’d been trying not to think about.

Shocked to the core, she quickly removed the security chain and unlocked the door. Opening it, she tried to ignore the way her heart pounded and how her stomach muscles trembled. “Aidan? What are you doing here?”

Instead of answering, he leaned down and kissed her. Another shock rammed right into the first. She should have pushed him away the moment their mouths connected. But instead she melded her body right to his and his arms reached out to hold her around the waist. As soon as she was reacquainted with his taste, her tongue latched onto his and began a sensuous duel that had her moaning.

In all her attempts at logical thinking over the past month, not until now could she admit how much she’d missed him. How much she’d missed this. How could a man engrain himself inside a woman’s senses so deeply and thoroughly, and so quickly? And how could any woman resist this particular man doing so?

She heard the door click and knew he’d maneuvered her into her apartment and closed the door behind him. Noticing that, she almost pulled back, and she would have had he not at that moment deepened the kiss.

This had to be a dream. Was that why the room felt as if it was spinning? There was no way Aidan was in Laramie, at her apartment and kissing her. But if this was a dream she wasn’t ready to wake up. She needed to get her fill of his taste before her fantasy faded. Before she realized in horror that she was actually kissing the short and bald mailman instead of Aidan. Had her fascination with him finally gotten the best of her?

The thought had her breaking off the kiss and opening her eyes. The man standing across from her with lips damp from their kiss was definitely Aidan.

She drew in a deep breath, trying to slow the beat of her heart and regain control of her senses.

As if he’d known just what she was thinking, he said, “It’s really me, Jillian. And I’m here to help you study for your MCAT this week.”

She blinked. Help her study? He had to be kidding.

* * *

Aidan wanted nothing more than to kiss the shocked look off Jillian’s face. But he knew that before he could even think about kissing her again he had a lot of explaining to do since he’d gone back on their agreement.

“I talked to Dillon a few days ago and he mentioned you wouldn’t be coming home for spring break and the reason why. So I figured I could help by giving you a good study boost.”

She shook her head as if doing so would clear her mind. Looking back at him, she said, “There’s no way you could have thought that. And what was that kiss about? I thought we had an understanding.”

“We did. We still do. However, based on the way you responded to my kiss just now, I think we might need to modify a few things.”

She lifted her chin. “There’s nothing for us to modify.”

That response irritated him to the core. “Do you think I want to be here, Jillian? I have a life in Boston, a life I was enjoying until recently. Ever since the kisses we shared on your birthday, I’ve done nothing but think about you, want you, miss you.”

“That’s not my fault,” she snapped.

“It is when you’re not being honest with yourself. Can you look me in the eyes and tell me that you haven’t thought of me? That you haven’t been wanting me? And be honest for once because if you deny it then you need to tell me why your kiss just now said otherwise.”

He watched as she nervously licked her tongue across her lips and his gut clenched. “Tell me, Jillian,” he said in a softer tone. “For once be honest with me and with yourself.”

She drew in a long breath as they stared at each other. After several tense moments passed between them, she said, “Okay, I have been thinking of you, missing you, wanting you. And I hated myself for doing so. You’re a weakness I can’t afford to have right now. It’s crazy. I know a lot of guys around campus. But why you? Why do I want the one guy I can’t have?”

Her words softened his ire. She was just as confused and frustrated as he was. “And why do you think you can’t have me?”

She frowned. “You know why, Aidan. Pam and Dillon would be against it. In their eyes, we’re family. And even if you were a guy she would approve of, she would try to convince me not to get involved with you and to stay focused on becoming a doctor.”

“You don’t know for certain that’s how she would feel, Jillian.”

“I do know. When Pam was in college pursuing her dream of becoming an actress, I asked her why she didn’t date. She told me that a woman should never sacrifice her dream for any man.”

“I’m not asking you to sacrifice your dream.”

“No, but you want an involvement during a time when I should be more focused than ever on becoming a doctor.”

“I want to help you, not hinder you,” he stressed again.

“How do you think you can do that?”

At least she was willing to listen. “By using this week to introduce you to study techniques that will help you remember those things you need to remember.”

She nervously licked her tongue across her lips again. “It won’t work. I won’t be able to think straight with you around.”

“I’ll make sure you do. I’m not asking to stay here, Jillian. I’ve already checked into a hotel a mile or so from here. I’ll arrive every morning and we’ll study until evening, taking short breaks in between. Then we’ll grab something to eat and enjoy the evening. Afterward, I’ll bring you back here and then leave. Before going to bed you should review what was covered that day, making sure you get eight hours of sleep.”

She looked at him as if he was crazy. “I can’t take time from studying to enjoy the evening. I’ll need to study morning, noon and night.”

“Not with me helping you. Besides, too much studying will make you burned out, and you don’t want to do that. What good is studying if that happens?”

When she didn’t say anything, he pushed harder. “Try my way for a couple of days and if it doesn’t work, if you feel I’m more of a hindrance than a help, I’ll leave Laramie and let you do things your way.”

As she stared at him, not saying anything, he could feel blood throb through his veins. As usual she looked serious. Beautiful. Tempting. He wanted her. Being around her would be hard and leaving her every night after dinner would be harder. He would want to stay and make love to her all through the night. But that wasn’t possible. No matter how hard it would be, he needed to keep his self-control.

“Okay,” she finally said. “We’ll try it for a couple of days. And if it doesn’t work I intend for you to keep your word about leaving.”

“I will.” He had no intention of leaving because he intended for his plan to work. He had aced the MCAT the first time around, with flying colors. Once he’d gotten his act together as a teenager, he’d discovered he was an excellent test taker, something Adrian was not. Determined not to leave his twin behind, he’d often tutored Adrian, sharing his study tips and techniques with his brother. Aidan had also done the same with Bailey once she was in college. Unfortunately, he’d never gotten the chance to share his techniques with Bane since his cousin hadn’t been interested in anything or anyone but Crystal.

“Now let’s seal our agreement,” he said.

When she extended her hand, he glanced at it before pulling her into his arms again.

* * *

He was taking advantage again, Jillian thought. But she only thought that for a second. That was all the time it took for her to begin returning his kiss with the same hunger he seemed to feel. This was crazy. It was insane. It was also what she needed. What she’d been wanting since leaving Denver and returning to Laramie.

Kissing was something they enjoyed doing with each other and the unhurried mating of their mouths definitely should be ruled illegal. But for now she could handle this—in the safety of her living room, in the arms of a man she thoroughly enjoyed kissing—as long as it went no further.

But what if it did? He’d already shown her that his definition of kissing included any part of her body. What if he decided he wanted more than her mouth this time? Her hormones were going haywire just thinking of the possibility.

He suddenly broke off the kiss and she fought back a groan of disappointment. She stared up at him. “Okay, where’s the study guide?” he asked her.

She blinked. Her mind was slow in functioning after such a blazing kiss. It had jarred her senses. “Study guide?”

He smiled and caressed her cheek. “Yes, the MCAT study guide.”

“On my kitchen table. I was studying when you showed up.”

“Good. And you’ll study some more. Lead the way.”

* * *

Aidan leaned back in his chair and glanced over at Jillian. “Any questions?”

She shook her head. “No, but you make it seem simple.”

He smiled. “Trust me, it’s not. The key is to remember that you’re the one in control of your brain and the knowledge that’s stored inside of it. Don’t let retrieving that information during test time psych you out.”

She chuckled. “That’s easy for you to say.”

“And it will be easy for you, as well. I’ve been there, and when time allows I tutor premed students like yourself. You did well on the practice exam, which covers basically everything you need to know. Now you need to concentrate on those areas you’re not so sure about.”

“Which is a lot.”

“All of them are things you know,” he countered. He believed the only reason she lacked confidence in her abilities was because the idea of failing was freaking her out. “You don’t have to pass on the first go-round. A lot of people don’t. That’s why it’s suggested you plan to take it at least twice.”

She lifted her chin. “I want to ace it on the first try.”

“Then do it.”

Aidan got up from his chair and went over to the coffeepot sitting on her kitchen counter. He needed something stronger than caffeine, but coffee would have to do. He’d been here for five hours already and they hadn’t stopped for lunch. The key was to take frequent short breaks instead of one or two long ones.

She had taken the online practice exam on verbal reasoning and he thought she’d done well for her first time. He’d given her study tips for multiple-choice exams and gone over the questions she had missed. Personally, he thought she would do fine, although he thought taking the test in two months was pushing it. He would have suggested three months instead of two.

“Want some coffee?” he asked, pouring himself a cup.

“No, I’m okay.”

Yes, she definitely was. He couldn’t attest to her mental state with all that she’d crammed into that brain of hers today, but he could definitely attest to her physical one. She looked amazing, even with her hair tied back in a ponytail and a cute pair of reading glasses perched on her nose. He was used to seeing her without makeup and preferred her that way. She had natural beauty with her flawless creamy brown skin. And she looked cute in her jeans and top.

 

He glanced at his watch. “Jillian?”

She glanced up from the computer and looked over at him. “Yes?”

“It’s time to call it a day.”

She seemed baffled by his statement. “Call it a day? I haven’t covered everything I wanted to do today.”

“You covered a lot and you don’t want to overload your brain.”

She stared at him for a moment and then nodded and began shutting down her computer. “Maybe you’re right. Thanks to you, I did cover a lot. Definitely a lot more than I would have if you hadn’t been here. You’re a great tutor.”

“And you’re a good student.” He glanced at his watch again. “What eating places do you have around here?”

“Depends on what you have a taste for.”

He had a taste for her, but knew he had to keep his promise and not push her into anything. “A juicy steak.”

“Then you’re in luck,” she said, standing. “There’s a great steak place a few blocks from here. Give me a few minutes to change.”

“Okay.” He watched her hurry off toward her bedroom.

When she closed the door behind her, he rubbed a hand down his face. Jillian was temptation even when she wasn’t trying to be. When he’d asked about her roommate she’d told him that Ivy had gone home for spring break. That meant...

Nothing. Unless she made the first move or issued an invitation. Until then, he would spend his nights alone at the hotel.