Czytaj książkę: «Down with the Dirty Danes!»

Contents

Cover

Title Page

The First Letter

The Next Letter

Letter Number 3

The Forth Letter

The Fiffth Letter

The Larst Letter which meens The End of the Story

Also by the Author

Copyright

About the Publisher

THE FIRST LETTER

From Berwin sun of Egfrith to Wulfric sun of Elred

Dear cosen,

Yes – a letter from me! Surprise!

You dident think Id ever learn to rite did you? Nor did Mum. She thinks riteing is only for monks.

‘No monking for you, Berry,’ she says.

‘Pleese, pleeeeeese,’ I said. ‘Let me be a monk and learn redeing and riteing.’

But no luck. I had to do dull stuff like fiting and digging all the time. And when there was no fiting, it was

WORSE!!

Yes, you got it. Minding the baby and looking after the gote and the geese.

NO FUN!!!

So how cum Berry is riteing a letter, I heer you say?

Its a long story but Ill tell you.

Larst month everything was V.V. BAD heer. Lots of misty mist and nasty news. Espeshally – King Alfrid was being smashed to smithers by the lowsy old Danes. The English were doing really badly in all the fiting.

ENGLISH O DANES ZOOO

Becoz King A was losing, everywun was running out on him. Rotten swines! Whats the point of having a king if you dont stick by him?

Thats what Mum said. ‘Rotten swines they are, Egfrith,’ she said to my dad. ‘Sumwuns got to stand by King Alfrid. Youll have to go and be in his army.’

‘Me?!’ said my dad. He dosent like fiting any more than me. Hees a bit of a passi passyfist pasi he dosent like being hit.