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Beyond Business

ELIZABETH HARBISON

BRENDA HARLEN

ALLISON LEIGH

www.millsandboon.co.uk

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FALLING
FOR THE BOSS

ELIZABETH HARBISON

My thanks to Andre Coutu and James Price,

who got me out of my old house. Thanks also

to Charles Clark of Waterworks Plumbing

in Snow Hill, MD — a true hero in times of need

(and leaky pipes and bathtubs) — who made my

new house so much nicer…and drier.

Prologue

The fact that he actually asked her if she was really sure she was ready to do it made her love him all the more.

What other eighteen-year-old guy with a normal libido would be that considerate? Meredith Waters knew—she absolutely knew—that if she’d told Evan she wasn’t ready, that she was chickening out even though they’d planned this romantic evening together for the past five weeks, he would have backed right off.

He might have needed a cold shower. A really long cold shower. But he would have let her off the hook without the usual guy nonsense about everything from promises broken to the supposedly serious medical consequences of unsatisfied desire.

Guys were, by and large, idiots.

But not Evan Hanson. Evan proved there really were Prince Charmings out there, though they were few and far between. Evan was Meredith’s soul mate. She was sure of it. Not that they were the same kind of people—far from it. He was wild and she was conservative. But they complemented each other. And they felt the same way about the most important things. They had the same standards and the same goals for their lives.

Most important, Evan was a guy she knew she could count on through thick and thin. The school and their parents might have thought he was sort of a wild kid, but Meredith knew he’d always be there for her.

Which made her all the more sure that she would never regret what they were about to do. She was a lucky, lucky girl to have her first time be with a guy like Evan.

“Are you sure?” he asked her again, running his hand down the length of her upper arm.

They were lying in her canopy bed, facing each other. Her parents were out of town for four more days, so not only was the guy perfect but the setting was, too.

She smiled at him, taking in his dark good looks like a tall glass of cold water on a hot day.

And it was definitely hot in here.

“I’m sure,” she said, then cocked her head playfully. “But I’m getting the impression you’re not so sure.”

“Oh, I’m sure.” He pulled her over to him and kissed her deeply, rolling onto his back so she was on top of him. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, pulling her so close she almost couldn’t tell where she stopped and he began.

She loved that feeling.

They kissed and kissed, just like they always did. They’d done it so much at this point that they practically had it down to a science. He moved his mouth this way, she moved her mouth that way, their tongues touched, and—poof! Magic.

“I love you, Mer,” Evan whispered, slowly rolling her over so she was on her back on the soft mattress and laced-edged sheets she’d bought last month with this moment in mind.

“I love you, too,” she said, her response automatic and completely without doubt. “More than you’ll ever realize.”

He gave that Cheshire-cat grin she adored and reached over to turn off the light on her bedside table.

It took a moment for her eyes to adjust to the light, but when they did she noticed a slash of moonlight cutting through the curtains and spilling onto her bed.

Perfect.

And it was. It was just … right.

Afterward, as she lay in the bed looking out the window while the moon slowly floated higher and crossed the sky like a big silver balloon, she felt more joy than she’d ever felt in her entire life.

Meredith smiled in the dark as Evan talked to her in hushed tones about how beautiful she was and how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her and how if he didn’t get over to the Silver Car Diner for some blueberry pancakes and vanilla cola fast he was going to die.

This, she realized, was perfect contentment.

What she didn’t realize, in these last few moments of blissful ignorance, was that within two months Evan would be thousands of miles away, without so much as a goodbye, and that he wouldn’t look back for more than a decade.

Chapter One

“And that concludes the reading of the will of George Arthur Hanson.”

Evan Hanson sat still in the stiff leather chair, feeling like a caricature of the prodigal son, drawn in invisible ink.

He’d returned, as prodigal sons always did, against his better judgment. Instinct had warned him that this would be nothing but trouble—and probably painful to boot—but he’d ignored instinct.

That was a mistake.

His uncle, David Hanson, had been unusually persuasive in convincing him to come back for the reading of the will. David knew Evan had suffered years of conflict with his father, and that George hadn’t spoken to his son since he’d left. Still, David had pointed out to Evan that, while it might be too late to mend fences with his father, he could at least come and hear the patriarch’s last message to him and perhaps gain some peace.

It had been peaceful, all right. In fact, his father’s message was a resounding silence.

George Hanson had neglected to so much as mention Evan’s name in his will, not even to say, “And to my second son, Evan, I leave absolutely nothing. Nada. Zip. Not even a stainless-steel spoon.”

It was as if Evan didn’t exist to his father.

No, it was worse than that. Evan knew his father well enough to know this lack of mention meant that, to George, Evan really hadn’t existed anymore once he’d left the country twelve years ago. Since George had effectively run him out of town twelve years ago, that was, by holding the worst kind of emotional blackmail over his head.

Since then, his job presumably done, George had written Evan off, forgotten about him completely.

Everyone knows it’s more of an insult to ignore someone than to tell them off. And George had ignored Evan like a champ. They hadn’t spoken in twelve years. Sure, Evan could shoulder half the blame for that, but when he’d left he was only eighteen, and his father knew damn well he’d created a situation that made Evan feel as if he couldn’t come back.

Surely George should have seen the crisis he’d sent his teenage son into and done something to fix it, or at least make it better. It wasn’t in George’s nature to extend an olive branch, but even pelting Evan with olives would have been better than the eerie silence.

George hadn’t bothered to do anything. He probably hadn’t even thought about his middle son more than once or twice in the time between Then and Now.

If only Evan had the same sort of control over his thoughts. He’d have liked to forget his father … and the difficulty of losing his mother when he was seventeen.

And one or two other heartaches—well, one in particular—that had shaped him into the man he was today. A man who wanted nothing to do with his family or with intimate relationships of any sort.

The lawyer closed his books, and Evan’s relatives began to discuss the reading amongst themselves, expressing anger at what they had or had not received and at the fact that George had left his young wife full control of Hanson Media Group.

Evan didn’t care. It wasn’t his problem. None of this was his problem. So with full intentions of leaving it behind forever, he took a deep breath, got up out of his chair and walked purposefully out of the room, planning to keep going until he got to the airport and left American soil for good.

He must have actually convinced himself that no one was aware of his presence because when he heard someone calling his name behind him, at first it didn’t register.

“Evan!” It was a woman’s voice. One he didn’t recognize, though there was nothing surprising about that. It had been more than a decade since he’d heard the voice of anyone in that boardroom.

“Please stop, Evan,” she said again. “I’d like to talk to you for a moment.”

He stopped and turned to see his father’s wife coming toward him in the hallway, a worried expression knitting her flawless features. Her golden hair framed her face as if it had been painted by Vermeer, and her green eyes were bright and alive.

Helen Hanson couldn’t have been more obviously a trophy wife if she had been gilded and nailed to a slab of marble.

He’d never met her before—his father had married shortly after he’d left—but, given the circumstances of their meeting now, it wasn’t easy to feel any warmth toward her.

“I know you’re probably angry about what just happened in there,” she began.

“I’m not angry.” His tone was cold like his father’s, he realized with disgust. “What happened in there—” he gestured toward the room “—is no surprise. In fact, it’s absolutely typical of your husband.”

She gave a pained nod. “I see why you feel that way, but he was your father, Evan. Don’t forget that. Though I know you must feel he rejected you.”

He’d thought he’d reached his fill of pain but Helen’s words managed to slice deeper still. “I don’t feel he rejected me, I know he rejected me. But don’t worry about it, it’s not the first time. And knowing how spiteful the old son of a bitch could be, it’s probably not the last time, either.”

“Evan—”

“He could always find a way to express his displeasure with his family.” Evan gave a dry laugh. “You might want to watch your own back. Not that you really have anything to worry about. I mean, you did get the company.”

Helen winced slightly and hesitated before speaking. “Evan, the company belongs to the Hanson family. All of you, not me. It always will.”

He gave a dry laugh and looked toward the conference room of the Hanson Media offices, where everyone was still arguing about the outcome of the will. “Try telling that to them.”

“They’ll find out in time,” she answered. Her tone was dismissive of them, but she was looking at Evan intently. “But you—well, it looks like you’re not going to stay in Chicago long enough to find out unless someone stops you.”

He looked Helen Hanson up and down. She was beautiful—no surprise there—but she also had some nerve. “Is that what you think you’re doing? Stopping me?”

She drew herself up and looked him in the eye. “That’s what I’m hoping to do.”

He shook his head. “Don’t waste your effort. I’ve got no interest whatsoever in what happens to this damned company now.”

“But you should,” Helen urged. “Don’t forget there’s a stipulation that twenty percent of the company or company revenues will go to the grandchildren in twenty years.”

Evan spread his arms and shrugged. “I realize my father probably didn’t tell you much about me, so maybe it’s news to you, but I don’t have any kids.”

Helen’s expression softened. “I do know that. But you’re only thirty, Evan. You don’t know what’s going to happen in the future. You might well change your mind.”

It was on the tip of his tongue to contradict her, but he’d seen many foolish men make the mistake of banking on their single and childless status, only to be surprised by some turn of events later in life.

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll grant you that—I don’t know what’s going to happen. But if I should have kids in the future, they don’t need the tainted fortunes of George Hanson, anyway.”

She shook her head. “Don’t let the sins of your father be visited upon your son.” She smiled. Even though it was a small, sad smile, it was dazzling. “Or your daughter, as the case may eventually be.”

Evan couldn’t see that happening, and it made him uncomfortable to hear Helen say it, but he didn’t argue the case. There was no point. “I’ll take my chances,” he said, then added halfheartedly, “So will my unborn children.”

“Evan, please. Reconsider. Take just a little time. This isn’t just about the business. It’s about your family. Not your father, but your brothers. The whole family is fractured, and they can’t heal without you. You’re part of them.”

He knew he should just walk away, but the woman’s desperation intrigued him. Why should she care so much whether a man she’d never met before stayed or went? Surely her husband had told her what a good-for-nothing his middle son was.

“What are you asking me to do?” he asked her.

“I’d like you to stay,” Helen said, her voice ringing with sincerity. “I know it probably sounds strange to you, since we don’t know each other, but I’ve got a good feeling about you. I’d like to have your help—actually, Evan, I need your help—in returning Hanson Media Group to its former glory.”

He hadn’t seen that one coming. If she hadn’t looked so completely earnest, he would have laughed. Instead, he just asked the logical question. “Why me? You’ve got the whole team on your side.” He gestured toward the conference room. “Every one of them has more experience with the company than I do.”

Helen glanced behind her and took a step closer to Evan. Her light perfume surrounded her like a protective barrier of … flowers. “But I’m not sure they’re going to stay onboard in light of your father’s directives. George had a way of manipulating things, you know.”

Oh, he knew.

“Anyway,” she went on quickly, as if realizing she shouldn’t have said that, “I don’t know why, but, Evan, I have the feeling I can trust you.”

He followed her gaze behind her. No one was there. He almost wished there was someone, though, because he wasn’t at all sure he wanted Helen Hanson’s confidence. “Look,” he said uneasily. “I don’t know what you’ve got in mind, but I can’t promise I can do anything to help you.”

She sized him up for a moment before saying, “I care about you and your brothers. I truly care about your entire family. Do you believe that?”

He shrugged. “I don’t have any reason not to, I suppose.” After all, Helen held all the cards. With controlling interest in the company, she didn’t have to deal with any of the Hansons now. If she was doing so, it was by choice.

Her smile was genuine. “Good. Then trust me when I say that the company needs you.”

“The company has been doing just fine without me for a lot of years.”

“Not really,” Helen said. “In fact, the bottom line these past few years has been decidedly bleak.”

Evan frowned. “How bleak?”

“Bleak enough that the porn scandal on the Web site was enough to push us firmly into the red.”

Jack had e-mailed him—when was it? A month ago? Two?—indicating that the family should get more involved in the business, but Evan had assumed it was just a ploy to get him back into the fold. He’d never imagined that his father had actually dropped the ball and sent the business hurtling toward bankruptcy.

Still, what could Evan do? The only job he’d ever had was running a little beachfront bar in Majorca. And even that could hardly be considered work.

“Well, I’m sorry to hear that, honestly.” Evan shrugged. “But if you’re looking to bring the business back to life, you’re looking at the wrong guy. I’m not much of a corporate type. It’s not just that I don’t want to help, it’s that I honestly don’t have anything to offer.”

“Maybe not, but you’re a risk taker, from what your father told me. And I can tell you’re an honest man. He told me that, too. Hanson Media needs that right now.”

That stopped Evan. “My father told you that?” He gave a wry smile. “You do know my father was George Hanson, right?”

“He was more fond of you than you know,” Helen said, and she sounded as though she really believed it. “He talked about you quite a lot. Said you’d left when you were young and that you’d been living overseas all this time.”

“He told you that.”

She nodded. “You know, he thought you’d be back. For years he thought you’d come crawling back asking for money, and when you didn’t he was secretly impressed.”

Evan was embarrassed at the small lump that formed in his throat. He wanted to believe this, even while he still loathed the man and what he’d done to Evan. He wanted, if only for his own peace of mind, to believe that his father hadn’t been so detached that he’d just completely forgotten him. “Not so impressed that he ever tried to contact me.”

“No.” A distant look came into her eyes, and she shook her head. “But you know as well as I do that the fact that he didn’t contact you had nothing to do with the amount of pride or lack of pride he felt in you. It was all about his own pride. Everything was about his pride,” she added softly.

Evan looked at his father’s wife with new eyes. Most women in her position would have been content to let the whole family dissolve so they could regain the money and power for themselves, but Helen was actually reaching out to them.

Now he was left with a choice. He’d already stood here for five minutes talking to her. Five minutes were chipped away from his intended release from the Hanson family. Now he was actually considering Helen’s plea for him to stay, and he wasn’t sure that was a good idea.

“Look, Helen, what’s the upshot here? Give me the bottom line. What exactly are you asking me to do?”

She took a short, bracing breath. “Okay, direct and to the point. I can do that.” She met his eyes. “The company is down but it’s not out yet. For many reasons I want to fix that. My reasons don’t matter that much to you, because you must surely have your own reasons for wanting to stay. It’s your legacy. If you have children someday, it’s their legacy. The time to fix it is now, and I’ve got a plan. If it doesn’t work—” she shrugged “—at least you can’t say you didn’t try.”

“And what do you propose a guy like me, a guy with no business experience whatsoever, should do within this corporation in order to up the revenues?”

“That’s easy,” Helen replied quickly. “You’re smart. A guy with a social conscience and definitely a world view. And, not least, you are a Hanson.”

He listened, unable to agree with her for fear of what he’d find himself committing to.

“So what I propose is that you take over the radio division of Hanson Media Group.”

He gave a shout of laughter before he realized she was serious.

“The radio division,” he repeated, visions of Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern dancing in his head. “Me.”

“Mmm-hmm.” She nodded, her green gaze steady on him. “I think you’d be perfect.”

“You do know I have no experience in that area whatsoever.” He gave another laugh. He couldn’t help it. “I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

“Given the recent scandal, I think your lack of experience might, in fact, be a plus.” She smiled, but there was pleading in her eyes. “I’m only asking you to stay on for three months or so. Just to give it a try. What do you say, Evan? Will you do it? Please.”

He thought about it. Majorca would still be there in three months. So would St. Bart’s, Fiji or anywhere else he wanted to go. When he’d sold the beachfront bar, he’d made quite a tidy profit. His father would have been surprised to learn that his “beach bum” son was smart enough to invest his earnings.

In any event, he could afford—at least in the monetary sense—to stick around for a little while and see what happened.

The question was, could he afford the mental toll it would undoubtedly take on him to stay?

Suddenly the words of his uncle, David Hanson, came back to him. David had been trying to convince Evan to come back and mend fences with his father several months ago, before it was too late.

Think about it, Evan, David had said. You don’t need to do this for George. You need to do it for yourself.

Those were the words that had brought Evan back, even though he’d arrived too late. They were the words that had rung in his mind when he’d contemplated seeing his siblings again. Who knew where life would take them eventually? Right now they were all here, working together toward a common goal, and he had the opportunity to help with that.

Granted, failure was possible. All he could do was his own personal best. If someone couldn’t accept him or forgive him, he didn’t have to carry it.

“Okay,” he heard himself saying to Helen, despite the fact that it went against every instinct he felt in his gut. Instinct that told him to run like hell and never look back. “I’ll do it.”

Chapter Two

“What I’m looking for is someone to work in advertising and public relations under my brother-in-law,” Helen Hanson was saying to the young brunette woman before her.

Meredith Waters sat uncomfortably in the plush chair opposite Helen’s sleek, modern desk, wondering if it was appropriate or wildly inappropriate to mention her history with the Hanson family before this job interview with Hanson Media went any further.

She never thought she’d set foot in the company George Hanson had built. Not after what he’d done to her family.

“I think you’ll agree, the benefits are generous,” Helen went on, handing a folder across the desk to Meredith. Her hand was delicate and smooth, her manicure perfect. Helen Hanson was perfectly turned out.

Meredith glanced at the folder, so it at least looked as if she was interested. Medical, dental, two weeks’ vacation time, two weeks’ personal time … yes, the terms were extremely generous. A person would have to be a fool to turn this down.

Of course, Meredith would have taken the job no matter what, even if it had paid minimum wage and offered the single benefit of a half hour’s lunch once a week. Pretending to hesitate was just that—pretending.

It was all a game.

She just hoped she could play it without anyone finding out.

“I’d like to think about it,” Meredith lied. She didn’t need to think about it. She was ready to start now. “Could I take a day or two and get back to you?”

Helen looked uncertain. “I’d really like to fill the position as soon as possible. As you’re undoubtedly aware, I’ve only just come back myself.” She gestured at some of the packed boxes that were piled in the corner. “Plus, we have a major scandal we’re still trying to clean up, and there’s a lot of work to do. If you’re unsure of your interest, that’s fine, but please understand I’ll have to keep interviewing.”

Clearly, Helen was a master at this game.

Meredith tipped her head slightly. “You sure know how to make an offer a person can’t refuse.”

“Does that mean you accept my offer?”

“Yes.” Meredith smiled and held her hand out. “You’ve got yourself a deal, Mrs. Hanson.”

“Helen, please.” Helen shook her hand, looking delighted. “I’m so glad to have you on board, Meredith. Now, you’ll be working under my brother-in-law, David Hanson, in the PR department, but I’d like you to focus special attention on the radio division that’s now being run by my late husband’s son, Evan Hanson.”

Whoa! This was not the plan.

“I’m sorry, did you say Evan Hanson?” Meredith asked, feeling as though Helen had just punched her in the stomach.

Helen nodded absently, taking a narrow silver pen out of her drawer. “Mmm-hmm. My middle stepson, Evan.”

Meredith cleared her throat. “Forgive my saying so—perhaps the newspapers were wrong—but it was my understanding that Evan Hanson had shunned the family business and moved away. A long time ago.” Twelve years, if memory served correctly.

Helen jotted a note on a pad next to her and returned her attention to Meredith. “Yes, he was. But he’s back now, working with all of us to make Hanson Media the most successful business it can be.” She raised an eyebrow at Meredith. “That’s not a problem, is it?”

“N-no. I’m just not sure I understand.” Meredith had to back off. She didn’t want to look as if a person in the company could be her Achilles’ heel. “You want me to concentrate my efforts entirely on one division rather than the whole company?” This wasn’t what she’d had in mind when she took this job.

But now she was already committed.

“It should be an exciting challenge,” Helen said, hopefully unaware of the tension that was building in Meredith. “I think you’ll enjoy it. Yes, there will be some initial difficulties, perhaps, but once you and Evan start working together, everything should work out just fine. I have a feeling about it.”

What was she, psychic? Did she know something more than she’d revealed in the interview?

“I have to say, I’m not used to dealing with radio,” Meredith hedged, feeling a little frantic and trying to keep it out of her voice. “You might do better to have me learn the ropes there part-time while I’m also working other areas.”

“Don’t worry,” Helen said lightly. “Evan’s not used to doing anything with radio. I think, in this case, it will serve you well. Bob Smith had years of experience, but he couldn’t make a viable go of that division. So now it’s a blank canvas for you and the rest of the team to paint whatever future you want.”

Normally that would be a very appealing offer. Not this time, though. “Still, it’s hard to get by without any experience. I might be more of a detriment than an asset to a division I know nothing about.”

Helen was clearly unconcerned. “You and Evan will both have a very strong support staff under you, but I think this inexperience you’re concerned about is exactly the thing that’s going to help you think outside the box. Both of you.”

Meredith swallowed, but the lump in her throat wouldn’t go away. Nerves. She’d always had trouble with them. “Okay, Mrs.—Helen. Okay, Helen.” She didn’t want to do it, but she had no way out. “I’ll give it my best shot.”

Helen smiled broadly, revealing even white teeth and the kind of looks usually reserved for the covers of magazines. “Great, Meredith! I’m so glad to have you with us. I just know you’re going to do a terrific job.”

“Thanks very much. I’m thrilled to take it on.” In truth, Meredith wished she shared even half of Helen Hanson’s enthusiasm.

Unfortunately, all she felt now was a lot of insecurity about her job performance … and that was something she was definitely not used to struggling with.

It wasn’t just the job parameters: she knew how to do her work, regardless of the details. All of that had been laid out quite clearly for her, and she was comfortable in the knowledge that she could do it, and do it well.

What worried her was doing her job well when she had to do it so close to the man who’d dumped her without a backward glance.

Helen told Evan she’d hired someone new for the PR department, someone who would concentrate their efforts on promoting the new face of Hanson Broadcasting. He was glad of that, because, with the support of the previously existing staff, he’d managed to contact three notorious on-air talents, two of whom had already signed on, but he was at a complete loss about what to do to promote them.

That was where the PR department came in. They were, after all, the professionals. Radio should be easy for them. A contest here, a print ad there, that should do it. Radio was free; it sold itself. Evan’s meeting with David’s underling should only be informative, involving the plans they already had for promotion of the radio division.

At least, that was what Evan thought. Until David’s underling actually appeared at his office for their one o’clock appointment.

Meredith Waters.

Gleaming chestnut hair, with tinges of red that shone like copper in the sunlight; pale Irish skin that she’d inherited from her mother; green eyes; and a wide, generous mouth. Evan had never seen a smile so bright that could turn, in an instant, to a heart-aching sensuous curve that would drive any man to distraction.

He would have recognized her anywhere, anytime, even though he hadn’t seen her in … well, twelve and a half years. It was marked indelibly in his mind since it was the night he’d left the United States.

The night of their senior prom.

He hadn’t actually made it to the prom, of course, which was one of the reasons this meeting now was so … awkward.

The last time he’d seen Meredith Waters, it had been through her bedroom window as she’d sat in front of her vanity mirror, putting the final touches on her makeup and hair for a prom date that wasn’t going to show up.

Evan.

The image had haunted him ever since. Meredith, in a thin-strapped deep-blue dress, her pale shoulders creamy and tempting. He could feel the curve of them in his empty hands.

Even then, but certainly now, he recognized what a sweet, innocent beauty she was. Hers had been a difficult life, with a lot of hard knocks, despite her best efforts. Her parents, too, had suffered at the hands of fate, and, unfortunately, at the hands of George Hanson, even though they were good people who deserved better.

Evan thought she’d do better without him around.

Apparently, it hadn’t turned out that way. And by the time he knew what had happened, it was far too late for him to come back and make things better.

He wished he’d had the advantage of wisdom then that he had now.

Instead of rising to the occasion, he’d left. It was soon after his mother had died, and the rawness of that loss probably contributed to his confusion. No one to run interference for him. No one to offer even an iota of warmth to the house that had never entirely felt like home.

Evan knew if he’d stayed he would have gotten as bitter and mean as the old man—they were so much alike in other ways it was practically a shoo-in—so rather than doing that to Meredith and himself, he’d just moved on.

Until this moment he hadn’t stopped to regret his decision.

“Hello, Evan,” she said, her voice smooth and modulated. It was familiar but, at the same time, unfamiliar. “It’s been a long time.”

He was as paralyzed with surprise—no, shock—as he would be if he’d been looking at a ghost. In a way, in fact, he felt like he was. He felt like he should say something profound, but only one word came to mind.

“Meredith?”

She nodded, but no smile touched that beautiful mouth. “You recognize me.”

“Of course I recognize you. You look.” Beautiful. Stunning.

Haunting.

“You look the same as you always did.” But she didn’t. She didn’t look the same at all. She looked like a sleek, sophisticated version of her old self.

This was awkward. Really awkward.

But Evan still didn’t know what to say. Unfortunately the momentary uncomfortable pauses weren’t buying him enough time to come up with something pithy.

She smiled. And for just a moment, he could see the high-school girl inside the woman.

“Clearly you weren’t expecting to see me.” There wasn’t a trace of self-consciousness in her voice. “I was hoping Ms. Hanson would have let you know I was coming.”

This wasn’t making any sense. “Ms. Hanson?”

“Yes, Helen Hanson.” Meredith nodded. “She just hired me in PR and has asked me to assist you in promoting this division.”

A pause dropped between them like a tennis ball and bounced awkwardly into several silent seconds.

“Are you serious?” he asked after a moment. How was this possible? Of all the people Helen could have hired, and all the places within the company she could have placed a new employee, how on earth had it happened that she’d hired Meredith and wanted her to work with Evan?

Meredith’s smile froze a little. “Yes. Will that be a problem for you?”

Damn right it was a problem. It was hard enough to be back in Chicago and working in the Hanson offices. He was running up against memories—including lots of unpleasant ones—at virtually every turn.

But this? This was too much.

“No, it’s not a problem at all,” he lied. Then he forced what he hoped looked like a casual smile, though it felt more like he was grimacing. “I’m sorry, I must seem rude. It’s just that it’s been more than twelve years since I’ve been in Chicago, and I’m still trying to orient myself. Needless to say, I’ve been seeing a lot of people I haven’t seen in a long time and it’s disconcerting each time I get one of these blasts from the past.”

“I understand,” Meredith said, her tone cool, professional. Clearly she’d grown far, far beyond the awkward kid he’d once known. She was detached in her interaction with Evan now. It was very clear that this wasn’t personal for her.

Hell, maybe she didn’t even remember what they’d once been to each other.

For that matter, maybe he’d imagined it. Maybe this thumping in his chest at the sight of her was just the remembrance of a dream he’d once had. His life had taken so many surreal turns at this point that he wasn’t sure of anything at the moment.

“I do hope we’ll be able to get past any awkwardness and work effectively together,” Meredith went on, but for the first time her voice betrayed the merest trace of a waver.

“Absolutely.”

“Good. So let’s get to work on our plan to raise the profile of Hanson Broadcasting.” She glanced at her watch. “Do you have time to talk about it now? I’d like to get up to speed on your plans so I can start my work as soon as possible.”

There was no way Evan could just leap into this now. He needed a little time to collect his thoughts.

He’d begun outlining a mission already, of course, but it would have taken some time to prepare to discuss it even if it wasn’t Meredith waiting for it, but the fact that it was. Well, he just needed a little time to get used to the idea.

“I’m about to have a meeting,” Evan said, trying to sound regretful rather than unprepared. “Are you free later this afternoon?”

Meredith shook her head. “I told David I’d be available to talk to him this afternoon.”

Another pause spread between them.

“So maybe tomorrow—” Evan began.

“I am available at lunch,” Meredith suggested at the same time.

They looked at each other for a second before Evan said, “Lunch is fine.”

“Okay, great.”

“How about the Silver Car Diner around noon?”

The Silver Car Diner. As soon as the words were out of his mouth he regretted them. That was a place they’d been to together quite a few times in high school. In fact, it was his former familiarity with the place that made it the first thing out of his mouth, yet he couldn’t have picked a more pointedly sentimental place unless he’d suggested the backseat of his ancient Chevy Monte Carlo.

Before he could retract the offer and suggest something less personal, Meredith, with what could have been a look of surprise in her eyes, nodded and said, “Okay. Sounds fine.”

“Great.” Evan reached for some papers to straighten. “See you there at noon.”

She gave a small smile and nod and turned to leave. Evan continued to straighten his pile of papers, half watching her go, until she was finally down the hall and out of sight.

Working with her wasn’t going to be easy.

Meredith had felt Evan’s eyes on her as she’d walked away. For a moment or two she’d actually worried that she might trip or stumble, betraying her nervousness.

How in the world was she going to work with Evan Hanson? It was preposterous! If she wasn’t already so committed, she would have walked away from the job the moment she knew he was involved. But a lot of people were counting on her. This went far deeper than mere PR for Hanson Media Group.

Before she’d agreed to this job, she’d done some investigating and learned that Evan was hopping all over Europe and the Caribbean. She’d actually taken the care to make sure he wasn’t going to be around if she had to get involved in his family business. It never even occurred to her that he might end up coming back to Hanson Media Group—which she knew he’d always disliked—the moment she was hired.

If someone had offered her a bet, she would have bet everything she had that he wasn’t going to be there.

“Everything all right?” David Hanson asked her when she got back to their promotions.

“What? Oh, fine. Fine. I was just thinking about something.”

David looked skeptical. She’d already learned he wasn’t an easy one to fool. “You sure?” he asked. “There’s nothing I can do to help?”

She smiled at him. “Actually, I could use some information on how the television stations have been doing over the past year or so.”

He looked puzzled. “I thought you were working with Evan on the broadcasting division.”

“I am,” she said quickly. “But I think it will be helpful to know how Hanson Media is doing in other arenas. Maybe we can learn from other divisions’ successes and mistakes.”

David gave a dry laugh. “Hanson Media Group isn’t doing all that great in any area, but the fact is, the television division is doing nicely. We’ve produced an original medical drama that’s done really well, and also the reality show Run for Your Life will be back this fall.”

“Ah.” Meredith nodded and made a mental note. “That’s in its third or fourth season now, isn’t it?”

“Fifth.”

Five seasons. That was pretty solid. Her employer would be pleased to hear it. “And are the advertising revenues for those shows on par with some of the other popular mainstream network shows?”

“Absolutely. In fact, last year Run for Your Life aired after the Super Bowl, and the advertising went really well. You might want to talk to Bart Walker about that if you want the details. I’m not sure it really correlates to the radio division but it might give you some ideas.”

She smiled and nodded. “I’m very interested in getting details about the whole company,” she said. “The more information I can get, the better I can do my job.”

David studied her keenly and nodded. “That sounds good. We have an administrative assistant named Marla who’s ace at doing just about any research you can think of. You might ask her to gather some facts for you.”

Meredith fully intended to do all of her own research, but she didn’t want to stand out in any negative way to David, and she especially didn’t want to look like a know-it-all. Particularly since she knew more than she should about the workings of the company already.

“Thanks for the tip,” she said, smiling and heading for her office. “I will definitely make a point of contacting her this afternoon.”

“That reminds me,” David said, apparently unsuspicious. “I’m going to be out this afternoon, so if you have any questions, you can get me on my cell phone.”

Meredith took a sharp breath and glanced behind her, half afraid that Evan might be there and catch her in a lie about meeting with David in the afternoon.

But of course he wasn’t there. No one was.

“Don’t worry about a thing,” she assured David, hoping her duplicity didn’t show on her face. “I can feel my way around or find someone to help if I need to. It won’t be a problem.” She tried to project absolute confidence, though she was feeling anything but. “No problem at all.”

Chapter Three

Why had he picked the diner, of all places?

He probably just wasn’t thinking about it, Meredith decided. Perhaps it didn’t have the same ring of melancholy for him that it did for her. Not that it was a huge deal or anything. After all, it had been years since they were together, and the fact that he had been her first lover probably gave the relationship far more weight in her memory than in his. Twelve years had passed, yet some memories felt like yesterday.

* * *

“I love you, you know,” eighteen-year-old Evan had said to seventeen-year-old Meredith as they walked into the Silver Car Diner at 3:00 a.m. for a late-night snack.

“I thought you did.” She smiled, still languishing in the afterglow and warmth of his touch, despite the cold outside. “Otherwise I never would have … you know. Done what we just did.”

“Neither would I.”

“Liar.”

He smiled, that gorgeous devil smile that made her heart flip every time. “Maybe I would have,” he conceded.

“You would.” She smiled, privately secure in the wholehearted belief that he did love her, and nothing else mattered.

He echoed her thoughts. “Okay, but it doesn’t matter because I do love you.”

“I love you, too, and you know it,” she said, thrilling at the feel of the words tripping off her tongue. She’d been with Evan for over a year now, but she still felt the tickle of infatuation. That, she decided, was how she knew this was real love.

Evan squeezed her hand, and a tired-looking waitress led them to their favorite booth in the corner and took their orders for blueberry pancakes and colas.

When she had gone, Evan put money in the jukebox. Their eyes met and, as was their custom, he pushed a random letter and she pushed a random number and they listened to see what would play.

This time it was Jerry Lee Lewis singing “Breathless.”

Perfect.

“So you know what I’m thinking?” Evan asked.

“Probably the same thing you’re always thinking,” Meredith answered with a giggle. “But can we take a break to eat first? I’m starving. And it wasn’t a half hour ago that you told me you were going to die if you didn’t come here and eat some blueberry pancakes.” She gave a mock sigh of exasperation. “Even Don Juan took a break sometimes.”

He rolled his eyes. “That wasn’t what I was going to say. I mean, I’m all for that, but I was going to say I think maybe we should get married after we graduate.”

Her breath caught in her throat. Thrills filled her like bubbling champagne. “College, you mean.”

He shook his head. “High school. Why not? If we know that’s what we’re going to do anyway, why wait?”

A voice somewhere in her warned that this might not be a good idea, but at the moment she couldn’t think why not. “Graduation is in two months!”

“Great.” He reached across the formica tabletop and took her hands in his. “The sooner, the better. Let’s make your prom dress a wedding dress instead.”

“Come on.”

“Fine, we’ll go to the prom and you can wear something else for our wedding. What do you say?”

Meredith would have run off with him right this minute but someone had to be the voice of reason here, didn’t they? “What would we do about jobs? A home?”

He shrugged. “Whatever we’d do anyway. We could stay and work here, of course, but what about that trip to Greece? Why not just go and stay a year? We could work in a bar at night and just lie in the sun all day long, doing whatever we want. Whenever we want,” he added meaningfully.

She sighed. It sounded like heaven.

“Seriously, Mer, I would talk to your parents right now if they were in town.”

She gave a laugh. “If they were in town, we wouldn’t be here. And we wouldn’t have been able to—” she hesitated “—do what we did tonight.”

He twined his fingers in hers, and looked deep into her eyes. “And we wouldn’t be able to go back to your house and spend the whole night together.”

Spend the whole night together. She turned the idea over in her mind. She could sleep in Evan’s arms and wake up with him, seeing his eyes and his smile before anything else in the morning.

God, she loved him.

“I wish it could be like this every night.”

“It can,” he insisted. “It will. You’ll see.”

But Meredith was always skeptical of things that seemed too good to be true. There was always something deep inside her warning her that she might be disappointed. “I hope so,” she had said wistfully.

Instead of answering, Evan had kissed her.

At the time, she had taken that kiss as reassurance. A promise that would be kept.

Now she knew better.

As Evan and Meredith entered the restaurant together to discuss the mundane details of Hanson Media, the familiar smell of cheese burgers and waffles drifted into Meredith’s senses, and she had to remind herself to be as professional and as aloof as she could be.

It was hard to forget the past they shared here, but if Evan could be cavalier about it, she would, too. Since they had no choice but to work together, she needed to be very careful not to add undue discomfort to the situation.

“Man, this smell takes me back,” Evan said, inhaling deeply as they followed a pink-uniformed hostess to a booth along the back wall. “This is one thing I really missed when I was overseas.” He gave a laugh. “It’s hard to find blueberry pancakes and wet fries in Europe.”

Meredith thought he’d lost a lot more than diner food when he’d left, but she didn’t say so. “I’ll bet,” she said, sitting down opposite him on the cold vinyl seat. She felt like a poorly cast actress in a play about her own life. “But I’m sure Europe had its perks.”

“Yeah, chief among them being that it wasn’t here.” He looked at the small jukebox on the wall of the booth and shook his head. “Good Lord, they’ve still got Jerry Lee Lewis on here. You’d think they’d have updated that.”

“The jukebox only runs 45s,” Meredith pointed out, sounding didactic and snooty even to her own ears. “It’s not like you can just stick CDs in it.”

He looked at her with amusement in his eyes. “I left the country, Meredith, I didn’t leave the planet. I know how a jukebox works.” He smiled. “Though they do make CD ones now.” He reached into his pocket and produced a handful of change, which he dropped on the table with a clatter. “Still a quarter?”

She glanced at the box and felt for a minute as if she was watching a movie of her own life. How many times had they been here together? She’d probably studied the jukebox in this very booth before. Multiple times. It was a quarter. It was always a quarter here.

If only the rest of life were so consistent.

“You okay?”

His question startled her back into the moment.

“Yes, fine,” she said. “I was just thinking about work.”

“This ought to change that.” He put the quarter in and hesitated for just a fraction of a second before pressing C and 7 at the same time. “Get you thinking about math homework instead,” he added with a small laugh.

The sound of an old Platters song drifted out of the small, tinny speakers. Meredith knew it because it had been one of her grandfather’s favorites.

Evan had known that once. Was it too presumptuous to think that was why he’d chosen it this time?

“You’re not the only one with a memory,” he said, as if in answer to her unspoken question.

“What do you mean?” she asked. Where Evan was concerned, her rule was going to be Assume Nothing.

He gestured toward the jukebox. “You picked this song about a million times.”

She repositioned herself, hoping her straightened posture would pass for a lack of sentimentality. “That’s funny, I don’t really remember that.”

“Yes, you do.”

“What?”

He cocked his head and said, “We have a past, Meredith. There’s no getting around it, no matter how much you might want to. We can’t pretend we don’t know each other.”

“We don’t,” she said, too quickly. She sounded defensive. She was defensive.

She was going to have to get some perspective.

He shrugged and fiddled with a sugar pack from the little container on the table. “We did once.”

“What did we have, Evan?” She looked him squarely in the eye, even though it made her feel weak inside. “Obviously, it wasn’t that close, or that special, because you up and left it without so much as an adiós”

“That wasn’t because of you, Meredith.”

If she’d been successful at pretending nonchalance at all, she lost it then. “I didn’t know what it was about.”

“It was just … me. My own stuff. I’m sorry if it hurt you.”

That was it? After all these years, that was what she got in the way of retribution? I’m sorry if it hurt you.

Like there was some possibility that it hadn’t.

Like maybe she hadn’t even noticed, at seventeen, that the boy she adored more than anything on earth—the guy she was sure she was going to spend the rest of her life with—had just disappeared into the night. Lord, she’d been so sure—so wrong, but so darn sure—about his feelings for her that for the first six months she had continued to insist that something must have happened to Evan.

Imagined him wounded somewhere, needing help…. Thoughts had plagued her, night and day. She couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t focus.

And now he was sorry if he’d hurt her?

“It wasn’t just about you,” she said quietly, holding her outrage and disbelief deep inside.

“What do you mean?”

If he didn’t know, she didn’t want to have to explain it to him. It was all such old news now, anyway—how could she talk about it without sounding like a desperate loser who had been stuck in the past for all this time?

How could she explain what it was like for her—the girl who had trusted, and given of herself, and who thought if there was one thing in the world she could count on it was Evan Hanson—to find out that everything she’d thought was real for two and a half years was just an illusion? And even that revelation had come only after she’d gone through the undue stress of fearing the worst.

It sounded small to the disinterested audience, yet to Meredith it had been a life-shaping experience.

“What I mean is, we need to keep this about business,” she clarified. “Whatever we had was over a long time ago. And opening old wounds isn’t going to achieve anything positive or productive for either one of us.”

“Right.”

She went on, “Like I said, we don’t know each other anymore, and if we move forward acting like we do, based on ancient information, it’s just counterproductive.”

He hesitated, studying her, then said, “Okay, then. Business, not personal. Got it.” He pushed the menu aside. “I already know what I want, how about you?”

She knew she wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible, so she pushed her menu to the end of the booth with his. “I’ll just get a cheeseburger.”

“Medium well, cheddar cheese, no raw onions, right?” Evan didn’t smile, but he may as well have. His eyes clearly showed that he had won a point.

And her heart conceded that point privately. Though she wouldn’t have wanted to admit it to Evan—or anyone else, for that matter—she hadn’t changed so much since she was a teenager. Basically Meredith Waters had always been the same person—she had simple tastes, a good work ethic and she could be counted upon to take the slow-but-steady route.

The only real difference, and it had come courtesy of Evan himself, was that now she had a very cautious heart.

Meredith Waters was determined to never fall in love again.

Chapter Four

“You’re consistent,” Evan said to her, having predicted her order. “That’s a good thing.”

“You’re right.” She looked at him evenly. “It’s a quality I’ve really grown to appreciate in people.”

He paused, then said, “But you don’t mean that personally, right?”

“Right. It was just a general comment.” She didn’t sound convincing, even to her own ears, so when the waitress appeared to take their orders, she was glad for the interruption.

As soon as the woman turned away, Meredith tried to put the conversation back on track, or at least get it off the track it was on. “So let’s talk about your plans for Hanson Broadcasting. I understand you’re planning to change the format to all talk?”

There was a moment’s hesitation before he followed her into that line of conversation. “It’s hard to do anything unique in music radio these days, but with talk we can corner the market if we get or develop popular talents.”

“But there’s a lot of danger in that, too,” Meredith pointed out, comfortable to be back on less intimate turf. This she could talk to him about. This she could talk to anyone about. “As soon as I heard you wanted to switch to talk, I did some research. Almost every radio network that’s succeeded with talk has done so with shock jocks.” She hesitated, waiting for him to interject, but he just nodded, so she continued, “And though there’s reward potential, the risks tend to be high. Too high.” Especially given her current job description, though she didn’t add that. It would be awfully hard for her to do a good job if she was trying to put out obscenity fires all the time instead of gathering pertinent information about Hanson Media Group.

“What risks are you referring to?” Evan asked.

She chose her words carefully. “A lot of these DJs have trouble toeing the line. They want to be outrageous so people talk about them and listen to them.”

Evan shrugged. “If we want ratings we need people who are willing to push the envelope.”

Meredith frowned. It sounded as if things she thought were dangers were assets to him. “Which envelope are you planning on pushing and exactly who do you have in mind for the job?”

He tapped his fingertips on the gray-and-white tabletop. “Envelopes, any. I don’t care. Who do I have in mind? Several people. I already secured the Sports Addicts, Bill Brandy-wine and Zulo Gillette. But the biggest coup is that I’ve already talked to Lenny Doss about coming here for the morning-drive hours. I think I can get him onboard.”

Suddenly it felt like the air-conditioning had gotten very cold. “Lenny Doss,” Meredith repeated. His name had come up quite a few times in her research. So had the Sports Addicts, and though they weren’t her cup of tea, they were essentially harmless. “You’ve got to be kidding.”

“Nope.” He looked quite pleased with himself. “All it took was the right offer.”

Alarm bells were going off in her head and he was oblivious. “Evan, you can’t hire Lenny Doss.”

That got his attention. “Why not?”

Did she really need to spell this out? “The guy is a major liability. The last company that hired him ended up paying the FCC more than half a million bucks in fines.”

Evan nodded with apparent understanding. “You’re referring to him dropping the F-bomb on the air.”

“No—well, yes, but not just that.” She couldn’t even imagine trying to clean up after Lenny Doss. “He also had his listeners go to the Washington Monument and—”

Evan put his hand up. “I know all about that. You’re right, it’s inexcusable, but it’s not going to happen again.”

She couldn’t believe he knew this stuff and still wanted to hire the guy. “Evan, if you hire Lenny Doss, you are in danger of putting the final nail in the coffin of Hanson Media Group.”

He looked at her and she noticed his jaw was tensing the way it always had when he was frustrated.

Evan Hanson didn’t like being told he couldn’t do something. Never had.

“I’m aware of the dangers,” he said. “This business may be new to me, but as soon as Helen put me on the job, I did my research, and I surrounded myself with some pretty knowledgeable people.”

“I’m not saying you can’t do your job,” she said. “I’m saying …” What was she saying? How could she finish that sentence without coming off more adversarial than she already had? “That if you do this, you’re going to make it hard for me to do my job.”

Evan looked at her evenly, then smiled and said, “Tactful recovery.”

Fortunately, they were interrupted by the arrival of their food.

“That was fast,” Meredith commented gratefully as the young redheaded busboy set a plate down with a clatter in front of her. A French fry fell off and landed next to the plate, leaving a small splatter of gravy on the formica.

“I’m sorry,” the kid said quickly, reaching to clean it up and nearly knocking her glass of ice water into her lap.

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” she said quickly, noticing Evan pushing her plate a little to the side before the kid accidentally knocked into it, too.

Funny how they could be a good team in such a small way, or at least work in harmony to save a plate, and yet they disagreed about virtually everything of any importance.

“We’ll take it from here,” Evan said in a way that was distinctly dismissive.

“Thanks,” Meredith added to the kid.

The busboy left and Evan turned his attention back to Meredith. “I could almost swear that same kid worked here when we used to come.” He smiled, and Meredith’s heart did a stupid flip. “He looks like he hasn’t aged a day.”

She couldn’t help smiling back. “There’s always a kid like that working in places like this. I think they hire them from central casting.”

They laughed and for just a moment the tension was lifted from the conversation. It was back a moment later, though, when Evan said, “Now, where were we?”

Meredith picked at her French fries. “I believe I was trying to get you to see how crazy it would be to hire Lenny Doss and you were being bullheaded about it.”

“Ah, yes.” He smiled again. The tension in the air between them lessened a bit. “You don’t mince words.”

“Not when I’m this serious about something.”

He let out a long breath. “Look, Meredith, there’s also the chance that it will work, and it will raise the profile of Hanson Media Group in a really positive way. The business world needs to take us seriously and this could do it.”

“I agree with your theory, but I’m not so sure about your methods,” she said. “Are you willing to do this and take the chance of it blowing up in your face?” The air conditioner kicked off halfway through her sentence, and Meredith realized she was practically yelling to be heard. “Do you really want to be the one to blow this for your whole family?” she finished in a lower voice.

Evan tapped his fingers on the table again, louder, faster. His whole face—a face she’d once known so well, but which, at this moment, seemed like a stranger—pulled into a frown. Even his eyes appeared to darken. “Yes, Meredith, I guess I am willing to take that chance. And, with all due respect, I don’t think it’s your job to worry about it.”

“But that’s exactly what my job is. My department already has its hands full trying to salvage the image of Hanson Media Group from the whole porn scandal. Adding Lenny Doss to the mix is like trying to put a fire out with gasoline.”

Evan shook his head and took a big bite of his hamburger, looking unperturbed.

Understanding began to dawn in Meredith’s mind. “Oh, my God. You don’t care, do you?”

He raised an eyebrow in question.

But it wasn’t really in question. She’d seen this gesture before. It was an invitation for her to tell what she knew so he could either confirm or deny.

“You don’t care if the whole company goes under,” she went on, half to herself and half to him. “If you succeed, you’re all right with that, but if you fail.” She studied his face. “My God, Evan, if you fail, you don’t care about that, either, do you?”

The moment of silence that passed between them seemed so long that she felt as if she’d sat staring at him for five minutes, listening to the clanking of utensils and plates and the shouts and laughter around them. It was a standoff and he wasn’t backing down.

Well, neither was she.

“You always were afraid to take a chance, weren’t you?” Evan said finally.

“What?”

“You’re saying I shouldn’t do this because it’s risky. I think that’s coming from a personal bias on your part. You’ve always been afraid to take a risk.”

She thought of the risks she’d taken with him. The ultimate risks she’d taken in giving him her virginity and entering the kind of intimacy she could never erase. “I’ve taken a few.”

It didn’t appear that he took her meaning. “As I recall, you were as straitlaced as they come, always playing by the rules. Even in science class, instead of switching the chemicals up a little bit to see if we could make flubber or something, you insisted on following the program.” He made it sound like an insult.

But she was proud of having played by the rules in high school. It was easy to cheat, to lie and to deceive—she’d found that out later on. “Yes, I preferred to use the method that worked, that was tried and true. It’s just good sense.”

“Good thing Thomas Edison didn’t feel that way.” He took another bite of his burger.

How could he eat at a time like this? Meredith couldn’t even think about her food. “Oh, for heaven’s sake, you’re not trying to invent the lightbulb, you’re just trying to hire a proven jerk to put on the air so you can have the sublime pleasure of watching your family business explode like a firecracker.”

“That’s not true,” he protested, gesturing at her with his burger. “I am not trying to make the company go under. Despite what you think, I do care. I’m trying to help. But you’re right—if it doesn’t work out, it’s not going to be the end of my world.”

“So you’re willing to put everyone’s future on the line.” She felt the tug of an anger she hadn’t felt in a long time. “And if things don’t go the way you want them to, you’d rather bail on everyone who cares about you—no matter how much it hurts them—than do a little hard work to try and get along.”

He winced. She was almost sure of it. “That’s an easy explanation, isn’t it? Blame me instead of the reality that some people and situations are not a good fit.”

That stung. Meredith took a bracing breath and put her palms down on the cool tabletop. “Let’s get back on the subject before we start getting personal, shall we?” Shall we? Did she really say that? Suddenly she was a Victorian spinster.

“Fine by me.”

“But I want to go on record as saying I don’t think you should hire Lenny Doss.”

He shrugged. “Then put me on record as saying I still disagree with you on that one.”

Big surprise. “Evan, please think about this seriously. The guy is a huge millstone. Obviously Megachannel Network didn’t think he was worth the risk, because they let him go.”

“I know that,” he conceded.

“If you put him on the schedule, and he screws up—as he’s bound to—it’s not just Hanson, it’s you, too. You’re going to look like a fool. Your reputation will be shot.”

He gave a single spike of a laugh. “You can do better than that, Mer. You know I don’t care about my reputation.”

His use of the old nickname disconcerted her. “Maybe you should.”

“Listen,” he went on, leaning slightly toward her. “I hear what you’re saying, and I promise I took it into consideration before I ever approached Doss. But I really do believe he’s learned his lesson. If I thought, as you do, that he was going to be a problem, I wouldn’t be trying to hire him. Honestly. Besides, we have a six-second delay in place, too. If he says anything objectionable, it won’t make it on air.”

“You hope.”

“I know.” He was always good at persuading her away from her better judgment. “Trust me.”

Luckily for Meredith, her spine had gotten a lot stronger in the years since she’d last seen him. “You haven’t signed him yet?”

He shook his head. “It’s just a matter of time. I’ll have an answer in a few days. A week at the most.”

“And are you looking into other options in the meantime?’

“Of course.”

She nodded, thinking that bought her a little bit of time at least. Now she just needed to get away from this conversation—she needed to get away from Evan—so she could pull herself together and figure out a way to solve this problem she found herself swimming in. “Then let’s revisit this when you have a better idea of who you’re bringing into the company. Once you’ve hired the talent and set up the schedule, we’ll come up with a plan to give you the best possible visibility.”

He narrowed his brown eyes slightly and looked at her. “It isn’t like you to drop something like this so quickly,” he said, his voice tinged with suspicion.

“Maybe it’s not like the girl you once knew,” she corrected, though he was right. “But you don’t know me anymore, Evan.”

“So you keep saying.”

She sighed. “Look, there’s no point in spending the afternoon arguing with you when it’s obvious neither one of us is going to back down.”

He nodded his agreement.

“And I’ve got more important things to think about than whether or not you’re foolish enough to hire Lenny Doss.” She opened her purse, took her wallet out and dropped a bill on the table. “If you’ll excuse me now, I’m going back to work.” She started to slide out of the booth, not an easy thing to do gracefully, especially when she’d just taken that parting shot.

He looked at the money, then back at her. “I’ll pay for lunch, Meredith.”

She shook her head. “No need.” She stood up and straightened her suit, hoping the gesture would magically bring back the objectivity she seemed to have lost. “Listen, I’m really sorry to have to cut this short, but, like I said, we’ll revisit this later.” She hoped to God she wouldn’t really have to discuss this, or anything else, with him again. “Once you know more about who you’re hiring.”

“I know who I’m hiring.”

“We’ll see.”

He nodded. “I guess I’ll see you around the water cooler.”

The old joke, “Not if I see you first,” occurred to her, but it wasn’t true. The thing that was going to be most difficult about working with Evan was going to be the irresistible urge to be around him.

That was why she had to keep as much distance as she possibly could, starting now.

Chapter Five

Meredith stepped out into the hot July sun. Chicago’s streets and sidewalks were baking and so was she, but it had less to do with the weather and more to do with being so close to Evan Hanson again.

She’d only stopped a moment to catch her breath when the door opened and he came out behind her. “Oh, good, you’re still here,” he said.

She whirled to face him. “Evan! Yes, I was just heading back to the office.”

He looked her over for a moment then said, simply, “Meredith.”

She swallowed. “Yes?”

“Things are a little tense between us.”

No sense in being coy about it. “Yes, they are.”

“Are you sure you can do this?”

She didn’t have to ask what he meant. “Of course. Are you sure you can?”

He shrugged. “No problem.”

“Good. Why should a little ancient history get in the way of business?” She took a long, deep breath and let it out. “I wasn’t expecting to see you today—or any other time, to be perfectly honest with you—and it threw me for a loop.” He would never know just how much. “That’s all.”

“It was a shock for me, too,” Evan said. His eyes held a myriad of emotions. “But a good one.”

Was he suddenly going sentimental on her? Impossible. She gave a half shrug and nodded. “Then let’s have an understanding that from this point on, this is strictly business. Our past, such as it is, has nothing to do with the way we conduct our business. Deal?” She held out her hand.

He took it, sending a surprising tingle up her arm. “Deal.” His voice was smooth and low, a man’s voice now, yet still horribly familiar. She wondered if she would be able to keep her thoughts of him on a business level.

They held hands for just a fraction of a second longer than they both knew was appropriate. When Evan let go, Meredith’s hand felt suddenly cold.

He looked as if he was about to say something but just then his cell phone rang. He took it out of his pocket and glanced at the caller ID. “Damn.” He looked at her apologetically. “I’ve got to take this. Can I get you a cab?”

“No, no. I’m fine. Go back in and take your call.”

He flipped his phone open and said to the caller, “Hang on, I’ll be right with you,” then looked at Meredith. “You’re sure? About … everything.”

“You bet.”

“Okay, I’ll be talking to you soon.”

“Absolutely.”

“Great.” He looked at her for a moment. “This will work out just fine.” Evan turned to leave. Watching his faded jean-clad form walking away from her, noticing the way his loose-fitting cotton shirt lay across his muscular back and shoulders, Meredith could have sworn she heard him add, “I hope.”

The usually short walk back to the office seemed to take forever. With every step the heat got more intense, along with her conflicted feelings.

When she finally got to the building, the air-conditioning hit her like a slap in the face, and she told herself she had to regroup for a moment then make some tough decisions.

She went back to her office. Fortunately David wasn’t there—he and his wife, Nina, were taking the kids to the Whistle Stop Circus—so she was alone. Completely alone. She sat down at her desk, a blanket of silence enveloping her like a warm fleece throw.

For a few minutes she couldn’t move, couldn’t think. All she could do was breathe deeply and try to still her pounding heart. Her eyes burned, but no tears would come, no release.

Just an empty silence.

How had a love that had once been so strong and so comfortable turned into the awkward exchange that had just taken place? It was as if she and Evan were two completely different people now. Strangers.

But they always had been, hadn’t they? As it turned out, Evan had never been the person she’d thought he was.

But, darn it, he still looked so much the same. When she’d first laid eyes on him today, her heart had tripped with excitement. Not anger, not sadness, but excitement. Her first impulse was to reach out to him. Then, only after those first split seconds, she remembered why she shouldn’t.

Fragmented thoughts of Evan’s disappearance, George Hanson’s sabotage of her own father’s business and her father’s subsequent heart attack and death ran through her head. And through it all, Evan had never contacted her. He hadn’t even sent a card to say he was sorry to hear about her father, and she knew he must have known since it was his father who had had such a strong hand in discrediting her own father’s small local newspaper so Hanson’s knockoff could take over.

George Hanson had systematically dismantled her father’s life. It was child’s play for him—just a way to get what he wanted. If Terence Waters wouldn’t sell the Lakeside Gazette to Hanson—at a greatly undervalued price—then it was the easiest thing in the world for the great George Hanson to force him out of business by creating his own competition.

The Lake Michigan Gazette.

The whole business had left her shell-shocked. If Evan had contacted her, said something—anything—compassionate, it would have gone a long way toward soothing her shattered nerves.

But he hadn’t.

And she’d eventually gotten over him, comfortable in the knowledge that she’d never see him again.

So now that she had, she was paralyzed with a strange combination of resentment and longing.

Gradually the ticking of the wall clock cut into her consciousness, and she managed to stand up and walk to the water cooler. The icy water chilled a path down her throat, returning her senses.

She had to talk to Helen.

She had to tell Helen the truth before this went any further.

Meredith was running on high when she got to Helen’s office. She stopped at the desk of Sonia Townsley, Helen’s assistant. Sonia was tall, thin, midforties, with striking gray hair cut in a fashionable style that stopped just short of being geometric. But the thing that struck Meredith most about Sonia was that she was always—always—calm and cool as a cucumber.

“Is Helen available?” Meredith asked.

“Yes, she is,” Sonia said, lowering her perfectly shaped eyebrows. “Are you okay, Meredith?”

Meredith nodded. “I’m fine, really. I just need to talk to Helen for a moment.”

“What’s going on?” Helen asked from the doorway to her office. She walked out and exchanged concerned looks with Sonia.

“It’s just. I.” Meredith stumbled. This was not the professional image she sought to project.

“I’ll go get some ice water for you,” Sonia said, tactfully removing herself from what was clearly an awkward moment.

“I’m sorry,” Meredith said to Helen when Sonia had gone. “I didn’t mean to drive her away.”

“Not at all. Come on in. Tell me what’s on your mind.” Helen gestured for Meredith to follow her. She sat behind her desk. “Is everything okay?”

Meredith perched uncomfortably on the chair opposite Helen’s. “I’m not sure. There’s something I think you should know about me. I should have told you before, but I just didn’t want to be the sort of person who couldn’t separate their personal life from business.”

Helen frowned. “But now you find you are?”

“Sort of.” Meredith nodded. “I find I could be.”

Helen leaned forward. “What is it, Meredith? Tell me what’s concerning you and we’ll work it out.”

“Evan and I have … a past together,” Meredith began. She could feel her palms growing clammy and cold.

Helen raised her eyebrows. “Evan?”

“Yes, we knew each other in high school.” Understatement. “We knew each other pretty well in high school.”

Helen looked over at Meredith with a curious eye. “You’re saying you dated?”

Meredith swallowed a lump in her throat. Dated. That sounded so impersonal. So milk-shakes-and-a-movie. So innocent. “It was actually a pretty serious relationship. At least it was to me.”

“Ah.” Helen nodded slowly and leaned back in her chair. “And this is the first time you’ve seen him since that time?”

“The last time I saw him it was the afternoon of our senior prom. He said he’d see me in a few hours.” She gave a dry laugh. “It’s been quite a few hours.”

“I’m sorry, Meredith. It must have been a shock to learn you’d be working with him.”

“It was a surprise,” Meredith agreed. But, mindful that she didn’t want to sound like a whiner who couldn’t get over her past, she said, “I’m not saying I can’t do what you need me to here—far from it. But my experience with Evan today made me think that, in the interest of full disclosure, I ought to let you know. If you’re uncomfortable with me continuing under the circumstances, I’ll understand.”

Helen smiled. “The circumstances sound like they might lend themselves quite well to your success here. If you already know Evan, already have something of a rapport with him, that might make things easier, don’t you think?”

There wasn’t going to be anything easy about working with Evan, but Meredith nodded. “It could. But it could also make him uncomfortable. If he’s reluctant to work with me, I’m not going to be of much use to you.”

Helen glanced out the window for a moment with a faraway look in her eyes. Then she turned her attention back to Meredith. “Is he reluctant to work with you?”

“I honestly don’t know.” Meredith gave a self-effacing smile. It would have been too weak for her to admit that she didn’t want to work with him. That she was afraid to even be around him. “He didn’t seem as rattled by our interaction as I was.”

“Are you able to work with him, despite feeling rattled by it?”

This was a moment of truth. Meredith prided herself on her reliability, and this was a turning point in which she could either give in to her weakness and do something she’d probably be ashamed of for the rest of her life or stand tall and work through her discomfort, knowing eventually she’d come out on the other side of it.

Intellectually, it was an easy choice.

“Yes,” she said, more comfortable following her intellect than her heart.

“Then let’s leave things as they are,” Helen said, locking eyes with Meredith. “You came highly recommended, and with everything the company has been through recently we need the best people we can get so that Hanson Media Group recovers its once stellar reputation.”

“I’ll do my best.” Meredith stood to go. She was feeling a little bit better now and was embarrassed about the alarmist manner in which she’d come to Helen at first. “I’m just glad you know the truth now.”

“I am, too,” Helen said. “Thank you.”

Meredith left the office, then stopped outside the closed door and took a deep breath. She couldn’t tell Helen everything, of course, but she’d at least told her what she needed to know about Meredith’s past. Hopefully now that wouldn’t come back to bite her.

Meredith set off down the hall, looking for David, when she ran straight into Evan.

He looked at her, then looked behind her at Helen’s office door.

“Meeting with the boss?”

She swallowed. “One of them.”

“Anything I should know about?”

She took a short breath. “No. Nothing important.”

He looked at her for one long, hard moment. Then, without a word, he turned and walked away.